The Imposter Syndrome Parasite: It's Real

What if the cure for feeling like an imposter isn't a mindset shift, but a you shift?

We open this episode the way we opened a live keynote: with a fairy tale, a room full of entrepreneurs, and one of us in full-blown panic. Because apparently, hosting an event about imposter syndrome while drowning in it yourself is exactly the kind of irony the universe enjoys.

From there we trace how perfectionism sneaks in not as a high standard, but as a survival strategy. It's a way of trying to earn the right to be here. We talk about why we're wired to love rough edges and real notes over anything autotuned, and what that means for how you show up in your business.

Then we bring in a profound perspective. Bass legend Victor Wooten says he has never (not even once) experienced imposter syndrome. Why? Because a copy is never worth as much as the original, even if the copy looks better. And biology has been insisting on your uniqueness since before you could speak.

We get practical for all those entrepreneurs out there as well: pricing with courage, niching with spine, publishing before perfect, and what to do when a pivot costs you the followers you never truly served anyway. Because here's what we know after five years of peeling our own self-awareness onion: Strategy starts working when your voice does. Tactics convert when your presence carries signal instead of performance.

And when the pressure to prove yourself creeps back in (and it will) the practice is unglamorous and simple. Love what you do. Love yourself. Correct your mistakes. And know it is enough.

You are the only version of you this world will ever get. Don't give it a copy.

If this one hit home, share it with someone who needs it, follow the show, and leave a quick review so more originals can find us.

Also: you can get a ticket to our upcoming I Do Epic LIVE Event right here: www.idoepiclive.com

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Transcript

A Fairy Tale And A Panic Attack

Speaker 1 0:00

Welcome to We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny Miller. Sunny, it is so awesome every week to sit down with you and discuss things that mean a lot to us and have a lot of fun. And I'm excited for this episode. Take it away.

Speaker 0:14

Thank you, Bart. I'm going to start with a little story about myself.

Speaker 1 0:18

Wow. Okay.

Speaker 0:20

So it was about two years ago at I Do Epic LIVE, and I was going to give a keynote and I was going to tell a fairy tale, which is kind of crazy at a business event already. So you kind of wonder how people are going to take take that, you know. The fairy tale I chose was the Emperor's New Clothes. And the psychological lesson of the fairy tale is all about perfectionism and imposter syndrome. And there I was getting ready to go up, feeling completely panicked and freaked out because I was experiencing both at the same time. So, like the emperor himself, I felt like I'm standing naked for all the world to see right now.

Speaker 1 1:07

Yeah, so good. Way to be vulnerable, way to say that. That's really cool of you because, you know, I think all of us, man, it doesn't matter who we are, have it faced imposter syndrome, let alone be teaching about it and then feeling it at the same time, going, oh my gosh, I gotta work through my own stuff that I'm teaching, right? And I think that's uh one of the the funnest things about life is is that the I think life likes to have a laugh at us sometimes. And for sure. And that's fun. And I'm glad when we can realize it and just laugh right along with it.

Speaker 1:36

Yeah, it's like the big cosmic joke of the universe or something, right? Totally.

Speaker 1 1:41

Yeah.

Naming The Imposter And Perfectionism Trap

Speaker 1:42

Well, yes, I'm not alone actually. I'm calling it the imposter syndrome parasite. And it worms its way in to up to 87% of entrepreneur psyches. Now the stats claim that 70% of the general population experience it. So I'm thinking, you know, with numbers like that, it's no wonder there is a whole fairy tale devoted to it.

Speaker 1 2:06

Amen. It sounds like you better share that fairy tale with us.

Speaker 2:09

Ooh, I might have to. Um, but for some reason, and I don't know that there's an explanation for it, but inside the human heart, we're all born with, or we soon develop a question about whether we're worthy or not and whether it's okay for us to proceed with being who we are, or if we if we have to suppress to impress, over-exaggerate, or compensate for ourselves somehow.

Speaker 1 2:33

Yeah.

Speaker 2:34

Just seems to be part of like the passage or the rite of life for most of us. Not all. We're gonna talk about somebody who doesn't have it. Yeah. Um, but the over-preparing, the endless revising, the concern for how we look, how we sound, if we make a mistake or not, is freaking exhausting.

Speaker 1 2:51

It really is. And I think it, like you know, it really gets exhausting too because we start thinking about what others are gonna think and how it's gonna come across to our family, or if we're gonna hurt somebody's feelings, you know, all those kind of things. And all that does happen in different ways, but at the end of the day, it really like has this thing of just hindering us from being us.

Speaker 3:13

One thousand percent. And I'm kind of lumping perfectionism in with imposter syndrome because it is a symptom of that. It's basically an attempt to earn worthiness through performance. And it's like this idea that if I can just be flawless enough, no one can take anything away from me. But like you just said, exactly my next thought of where I was going is that perfectionism leads to an unlived life. Yep. We never do the thing that we want to do because we're always waiting for it to be perfect or we're scared of what will happen once we finally put it out there.

Speaker 1 3:48

Yeah, I was talking to uh I was coaching uh a client and uh we've been working through some exercises, and it was really interesting when I uh ask him, because I asked him to start journaling about different things and stuff like that. And then I asked him to write the whole thing down the way he sees it from his perspective, right? So that he gets a real picture of how his mind's running, and then actually we work through some of those with actually implementing them. Like we're gonna test this and see if your hypothesis is true, right? And everyone we tested was not even close to what his brain had conquered up of how bad and how horrific and how terrible this was gonna be.

Speaker 4:28

So you were giving him real world evidence to show him that his brain was overreacting, right? Is that what you're saying?

Speaker 1 4:34

Yeah, exactly. And as we work through that, he by the, you know, like and I mean, we've done this over a few different weeks, right? And doing that, he's just come back and is like, I cannot believe what I do to sabotage myself. And I'm like, that's the imposter syndrome kicking in. And um, it was such an aha moment for him that it was just a huge breakthrough to realize that it's like, you know what? That's why we have skeletons in our closet, is because we're so afraid of not only ourselves, like, oh, I can't believe I even, you know, had this happen. And then the second part is how is somebody else gonna react to it? Yeah. So anyway, so I'd share that with you.

Coaching Proof: Brain Vs Reality

Speaker 5:15

So good. So the interesting thing is that the people that we love the most are usually those that are vulnerable, raw, authentic. They're the what you see is what you get personalities. That's who we're attracted to.

Speaker 1 5:28

Yeah.

Speaker 5:29

If you take music, for example, we don't love to listen to anything that is just straight up auto-tuned. It's like the bend before the note, and it's the tension of the vibrato between the wrong note and the right note that evokes the emotion out of us. So, in that regard, imperfection is what actually draws us to people.

Speaker 1 5:48

Yeah, I agree.

Speaker 5:49

It's somebody we can relate to.

Speaker 1 5:50

Yep.

Speaker 5:51

And because we're human, that endears them to us.

Speaker 1 5:54

Yeah.

Speaker 5:55

So Victor Wooten had a quote, he said, "wrongness in the right way is what makes us feel."

Speaker 1 6:01

So good.

Speaker 6:01

Isn't that great? But here's where I think things get a little bit tricky for all of us. What do we actually do when it comes to the idea that we what we create, produce, or put out into the world depends on the acceptance of other people.

unknown 6:17

Yeah.

Speaker 6:18

Like if you need to make money, or if that's how you choose to have a livelihood, people don't like it, they're not gonna buy it.

Speaker 1 6:26

That's true.

Speaker 6:27

So there's kind of an underlying ticking imposter syndrome time bomb waiting to explode, unless, and that unless is that we get radically real about who we are and decide to go all in on that person.

Speaker 1 6:40

Yeah. And I think this is a uh really good for me, and I've thought a lot about this because um, you know, being vulnerable, it's like, my gosh, when you're coaching people on different things, it's kind of like you can't have a bad day and you can't have things that phase you and you know, rock your apple cart because you're the pillar for all these people that you're actually coaching and doing stuff. But reality is you freaking do, you know, and it's like it's impossible not to be human and be, you know, and try to be superhuman all the time, because there are things that come across your path. And it's like, oh my gosh, can I really lean into this and not make my tribe feel like I'm not there for them? And throughout my career, I've really found out you can because they understand you are human, but you've been there a step ahead of them and they still want that training and that coaching, even though sometimes you need to heal and be through it a little bit before you expose it. But nonetheless, it's very important to understand that you can, you can do this, and it's uh it's an awesome feeling when your tribe does rally around you when you're going through that and even supports you more.

Speaker 7:55

Yeah, um, it actually reminded me while you were speaking, it it's a difficult position to be in. It is as a leader. I remember listening to a podcast, and I want to say it was around um relationship, and the one of the hosts of the podcast all of a sudden announced she was going through a divorce. And you're like, wait a minute, you're giving advice on relationships, but you're going through one. Yeah. You know, and and that's the tricky part, right? It's like, no, but I'm still human. And just because this is happening in my life for whatever reason doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about, you know.

Why Imperfection Makes Us Love People

Speaker 1 8:30

Right, yeah. It's a tough spot. It really is. It's it's one of those things that you got to think about in your own life and how you perceive something. And you know, we we brought this up before, so I'll bring it up here. You know, it's like when a person that you see you think in your own mind, true or false, that they're obese and yet they're a fitness coach. And you're like, what the world? What is the disconnect here? But I just want to remind our listeners that you know, Michael Jordan wasn't the coach running the team, but the guy who was running the bulls was not out there slam dunking the ball either. Yeah. Right? So it's it's it you gotta look at everything from the lens of what are the results that this person is getting, and not always what are they and who are they, if I'm explaining that right. I don't know if I'm making sense there. But you are.

Speaker 9:17

I kind of took us on a little tangent, but yes.

Speaker 1 9:19

No, but but that's really the thing is is that anyway, so sorry about the tangent, but just once again, we we can't be judgmental in some of the coaching and the people that we're looking up to when things happen in their lives, and them being vulnerable actually shows them they're better to you in some ways. Other times it can be a big red flag. So I'm just gonna say it that way.

Speaker 9:37

There you go. Okay, last week we talked about Victor Wooten. He is one of the most celebrated bass players alive. And I was shocked when he said he has never experienced imposter syndrome, not even one time. Here's a guy that started playing professionally, which means he was being paid for gigs when he was five years old. He's now 61 and he's still going and never had imposter syndrome. So I thought to myself, let's digest, dissect, and learn from someone who's actually never had this happen in his life versus theories or asking the Chat GPT bot like 10 ways how to overcome imposter syndrome.

Speaker 1 10:18

Yeah, that's great. I mean, that master, right?

Speaker 10:20

Yes, and he said some very profound words. He did. First one I loved was he said, a copy is never worth as much as the original, even if the copy is better. You are always the original you. So sometimes we look out there and we go, Oh, I want to sing like so-and-so, or I want to, you know, be a funnel master like so-and-so, or whatever. And we try to copy that, but it never works because it's not who we are.

When Your Work Needs Others’ Approval

Speaker 1 10:46

Yeah. Well, that's what I had to learn in my coaching, is when I first started, you know, I went through some different programs and wanted to learn how other people coached. And when I started to use their method, it was like, in theory, it should have worked really, really well, but it just did not work for me and the clients I was working for and with. And so I had to really realize that I need to create my model, how I do it, and really go after it from a different angle of me and be me. Um, and that was really, really tough because I didn't have enough courage at the time um to just be me and really, you know, just like, no, this is gonna be enough. Because it was always like, but I gotta do this, but I gotta do that. That's what this other coach does. That's what this does that, and that's how they do it, you know. And my words aren't as elegant, you know, all these different things. And I can't tell you that that never does creep into me. Um, even, you know, even today. I'll find myself once in a while being like, Oh, I want to speak like that person. And and if I did this, then that would you know attract this kind of you know, and I just gotta sit back and go, no, no, no, no, just be you.

Speaker 11:50

Yes, yes. There has never been, will never be another you. So good. And that's not just fancy Nancy philosophy, that's hardcore biology. So consider this: your fingerprint has never existed in the history of humanity and never will again. But did you know? Same with your tongue prints, your iris, and the curve of your ear.

Speaker 1 12:11

So cool.

Speaker 12:11

So if you really stop to think about it, your body has been absolutely insisting on your uniqueness since before you could speak. So, how do we catch up to what our body already knows?

Speaker 1 12:22

Mic drop.

Speaker 12:24

Uh, stop waiting for the world to confirm who you are. You'll never find it out there. It lives inside of you. And one of the things Victor um kind of explained is that his parents were really, really great at instilling in them to figure out who they were. Because if you don't, the world will tell you who you are. Amen. And the world will gleefully hand you a character to play, one that's impressive just enough, safe, just enough, and acceptable just enough, and call it you.

Speaker 1 12:59

Yeah, I agree. And I think that's one of the things, Sonny. Uh, that's why we named the podcast We Play Full Out. And I think that's one of the things why, you know, my why is I want to help people architect their life by design so that they don't give away their power. And that's why we've created the programs that we've created, is because we had that happen to us. Yep. We fell into the trap, and then when we realized it, it's like, no, and I still fight some of it, and so do you. And I think that's the whole cool part about what we're on the journey of right now is helping people really be their authentic self.

Speaker 13:33

Yes, yes. And if you don't, you're gonna spend your whole life performing that hand-me-down character and wonder why nothing feels real.

Speaker 1 13:40

Yep.

Victor Wooten’s Zero-Imposter Mindset

Speaker 13:41

So, real success in life, the kind that doesn't evaporate into thin air the moment someone stops clapping or starts withholding their affection, isn't built on other people's applause. So, what it is built on is completely knowing and loving yourself to the point where other people's opinions become information rather than any kind of a verdict. It's like, oh, that's interesting to know, but like I'm okay with who I am.

Speaker 1 14:05

So good.

Speaker 14:06

And he put this so beautifully. He said, Your success isn't dependent on other people. I'm not successful because you say I am. I'm not successful because I got awards. I'm successful because I love myself and I love what I do. Not sometimes, not on the weekends, every moment of every day, I'm doing my best. And when I make a mistake, I do my best to correct it. That's every moment I know who I am, and I'm not an imposter. I'm me, fully me. Gold nugget, my beautiful. Okay, so when we look at it from that lens, here's what's really interesting. Think about imposter syndrome. What if imposter syndrome is simply a sign that you have drifted from yourself?

Speaker 1 14:55

It totally is.

Speaker 14:57

The only time you're actually an imposter is when you're pretending to be somebody you're not.

unknown 15:02

That's right.

Speaker 15:03

When you're fully unapologetically, you there's nothing to expose. There's no gap between who you are and who you're presenting. So, what is there to expose? Nothing to expose. The jigs up before, you know, there's anything to begin with.

Speaker 1 15:16

Yeah, and I think that's awesome. And that's how we defeat imposter syndrome is by, you know, going through that, obviously. And it's like, you know, we've all heard the analogy that as soon as you put light on something, you know, everything weakens. And that's what we're doing right here is just putting light on things that we maybe have taken for granted. And I love that so much. Thank you.

Speaker 15:34

Yeah. So I'm gonna circle back around to what you were saying here a few minutes ago about us.

Speaker 1 15:39

Okay.

Speaker 15:40

So hindsight in life is a real eye-opener.

Speaker 1 15:44

It is.

Speaker 15:45

Last five years of our lives have been, I compare it to peeling an onion. And you know, when you peel an onion, what happens? You start to cry. Yeah. We've had a lot of tears shed. Um layer after layer after layer has been peeling off, and I feel like bringing us deeper and deeper levels of self-awareness and to the core of who we are.

Speaker 1 16:08

Yep.

Speaker 16:09

So performance and perfectionism, I feel like, are becoming more and more of a thing of the past for us. Uh, what I didn't personally expect was the identity shock that came with it, like this big realization of how deeply we've fallen into the trap, just like you were saying, of playing the character that the world handed us and convinced us was not just an ideal way to live, but the right way. It's like taking on a code of standards that you never agreed to and beating yourself up day after day because you're not reaching them or you can't feel the way you need to feel about them or all the things that come with that.

Speaker 1 16:44

Yep.

Speaker 16:46

Um what I have learned, and this has been again, I'm still like experiencing epiphanies in my life. I didn't think that I was like a performer. Like I grew up in a musical family. So to me, performance is like get on stage, perform, it's awesome, it's fun, you get off, you're done, you know. So every time people talked about performance, I'm like, I don't really understand what that means. Um, what I'm learning now is that performing is not performing, I should say, is as simple as sitting with myself and asking the why behind whatever it is I'm considering doing or saying. And it's getting in touch with that deeper nature so that if we do shoot a video or if I am writing something, it needs to resonate with me on a deep level. That means that I'm not just saying something that I think other people want to hear to make them feel good. Like I'm saying what's true for me. So and it can be scary because sometimes it's like people aren't gonna want to hear this, or I'm gonna offend somebody, or you know, everybody's gonna ditch us or nobody's gonna read it, or it's just gonna sit there. But if it's true to me, then I'm successful because I love myself and I love what I'm doing.

Biology Of Uniqueness And Self-Definition

Speaker 1 17:56

Yeah, I love that so much. And once again, I can't uh thank you enough for being vulnerable with our audience. And uh I know that I've gone through the same things in so oh, I mean, so many ways, you know, and I I just know that as I've gone through those things, I've had a lot of regrets and I've had a lot of things that I'm just like, dang it, I wish I would have just been me instead of trying to be a facade of me. And uh, you know, it's like there's been several times in this last five years to where some of the conversations that I've had, I'm like, no, I'd rather just not have this conversation. So I'll just act this way so I don't have you know, because I know it's gonna come if I bring some certain things up or I talk about certain subjects or whatever it might be. And every time I get like you said, I just fill up my body of like what are you afraid of? Like if they're really your friends and they really like you, and you've put enough for no for no better term, love in the bank, they're gonna see who you really are and they're gonna be okay. And uh, you know, I I just think it's a beautiful thing and it's something I have to work on all the time.

Speaker 19:03

So yeah, and I'm glad you said that because again, like all things seem to in this life, um everything comes down to the nervous system and safety. So like underneath most of us for some reason is this nervous system didn't get the memo that it's safe to be seen, it's safe to be wrong, and it's safe to s take up space without justification. And it's not even safe to love ourselves.

unknown 19:33

Yeah.

Speaker 19:34

So what I've been doing lately, and especially as I um write things or journal about things, or really try to dive more into who I am, is I started just kind of asking these questions of do I feel safe enough to express myself fully? Do I feel like people will abandon me if they know how I really feel? Will I lose love if I'm not what everyone expects me to be? Do I feel like I'm not worthy of love unless I show I am and or prove that I deserve it? That's been an I that last one's really gotten me lately. Because it's like, I'm gonna be vulnerable again, but I'm like, Bart, like, why do you love me so deeply? Like, I haven't done anything. And I've repeated that phrase so much that it finally hit me like, why do I have to deserve it?

Speaker 1 20:21

Right.

Speaker 20:21

Like, why can't I just be me and accept it? But for some reason, it's like, no, I've got to do something to deserve it.

Speaker 1 20:27

Yeah, it's so interesting. And once again, it's it's one of those powerful things in our lives that it's okay to just be and you know, not do anything, not not, you know. And it's like we've had this conversation a lot, you know, but like for some people, it's just walking in the room, that's all they gotta do. It's just be there, and it's so nice to have them there, and you just feel that energy. And if they never said a word, you're just like, I'm so glad they're present, you know. And so I I just think like I said, as we go through life, finding these little things out about ourselves is the gold nuggets of life.

Speaker 20:59

It is. Um, last one, do I feel like I can't express how I really feel? Because I'm responsible for the emotions of everyone around me, and I don't want anyone to be unhappy. And, you know, a lot of this again, diving into because um experience a I'm not gonna call it a loss of my voice anymore. It's more of a guarding. My voice didn't feel safe to express, which is why it started guarding itself. Yeah. So these have been very impactful for me of like, whoa, you know, my mind goes a hundred miles a minute, I'm showing up, I'm doing the work, I'm trying to keep everybody happy, I'm doing all the things. But if I'm not sitting here and going, whoa, I didn't actually express how I felt because I didn't want this to happen, like you said. But when you really take that time to step back and go, No, I've I've done my part. I can't give more than I've given. So either they accept it or they don't.

Speaker 1 21:53

Yeah, it's so good. Love that.

Leaders, Vulnerability, And Credibility

Speaker 21:54

Um, just kind of pivoting to talk about entrepreneurship a little because we see this a lot. With our with our tribe and with really all entrepreneurs. Um with imposter syndrome and with this safety wound, it's almost like you've stepped onto a stage with a huge glaring spotlight. Because suddenly your livelihood, your identity, and your self-worth are all sitting in the same seat. So kind of going back to those questions, do I feel safe enough to express myself fully can look like, do I feel safe enough to charge what I'm actually worth? To say what I actually believe in my content, even when it alienates some people. To show up on camera without the polished version of myself or to admit publicly that I don't have it all figured out. And I'm, you know, tying these back to like if you've experienced imposter syndrome, these are some of the things that you really want to start to think about and to uncover. And uh it's one of those pivots that you talk about in your business where if you show up fully, authentically as yourself, that's when the tactics and strategies start working.

Speaker 1 22:56

Yeah.

Speaker 22:56

It's not until then.

Speaker 1 22:58

That's true. Generally, it really is. And I've had to face this, you know, in the last few years, you know, you and I have made a major pivot into the, you know, the life coaching type of space, you know. And, you know, up till then it was just me. I wanted tactics, I wanted to teach these things, the new strategies, the new this, that, the other. And you know, you and I have attended a lot of events out there, and every time we attend an event, it's like 80% of this is mindset.

Speaker 23:22

I think they say 90% even, even 90, whatever, you know, for the stake.

Speaker 1 23:26

Depends on the person. And the rest is tactics, you know, and yet all the offers are tactics, and people spend so much money on the tactics. What they don't realize is 80% is a pretty big gap. And if you don't really dig into yourself and your authentic self, no matter what tactics you have, 80% is a lot bigger than 20.

Speaker 23:46

By far, you can do all 20% right 100% of the time, and you're still missing that.

Speaker 1 23:51

I see it all the time. That's what I'm trying to say. And so, like, but to convince the human out there uh that it's otherwise is very fascinating to me because it's like, well, nope, I'm gonna stick with the tactic. Next time the offer comes across, boom, they buy the and they're so addicted to tactics that they forget how to be addicted to themselves and allow the tactics to just be there. And what's funny is some of the ugliest websites I've ever seen have converted higher than some of the most beautiful sites I've ever seen, some of the craziest uh janky videos I've seen convert so high that it's just ridiculous when somebody may spends a fortune following every word, every tactic, every NLP strategy they can, you know, the dark arts, whatever, you know, to make this thing work. And it doesn't. It comes back to who are you? Are you authentic? Are you being you? And if not, why?

Speaker 24:51

Yeah. Okay, well, I have some other um examples here, but do I want to go through them or do you just want to do that?

Speaker 1 24:59

No, go ahead.

Speaker 25:00

Okay. I'm gonna say go sign up for the newsletter if you're not getting a hard copy of it. You can see them all but um okay, so will people abandon me if they know how I really feel for an entrepreneur? It looks like will I lose followers if I share a controversial opinion? Will clients leave if I raise my prices? Or will my audience disappear if I pivot, change direction, or outgrow who I used to be? Uh, next one is will I lose love if I'm not what everyone expects me to be? In business, that looks like will the market reject me if I niche down and stop being everything to everyone? Or will my community turn on me if I evolve? That can be a tricky one. Big one. And I'm not saying that couldn't happen.

Speaker 1 25:39

Well, that's what's where we're at. I mean, we've been evolving the last two years. And thank goodness we've had people start, you know, keep with us. But a lot of our old tribe, they have left us.

Speaker 25:48

Yeah.

Speaker 1 25:48

Because they're very much in the tactics.

Performance, Identity Shock, And Truth

Speaker 25:50

Well, and I think if people are ready to evolve with you, they'll go. And if they're not, they won't. It's just kind of like ebbs and flows of life, right? Will people feel betrayed if I show up differently than I used to?

unknown 26:01

Yep.

Speaker 26:01

And let's be clear, some might.

Speaker 1 26:03

Yeah, I've been there, done that, man. Like I've been a cowboy to a cyclist to a bodybuilder. Trust me, it's different.

Speaker 26:08

I'm not worthy of love unless I show I am and prove I deserve it. That can look like I have to keep producing content, keep launching, keep achieving visible results because if I go quiet, if I slow down, if I have a failed launch, I will have proven I never deserved the audience I built.

Speaker 1 26:25

So good.

Speaker 26:26

And the last one is I can't express how I really feel because I'm responsible for the emotions of everyone around me. That can look like I can't be honest in my marketing because I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable. I can't share my real struggles because I'm supposed to be the leader, the guide, the one who has it together. My job is to hold space for everyone else and there's no room for my own mess. Sounds familiar.

Speaker 1 26:48

Yeah. So good.

Speaker 26:51

But if any of those landed, let's be clear, you are far, far, far from alone. And the kind of exhaustion where your business becomes the place you go to earn your right to exist is one of the loneliest feelings there is. It's one of those things too, where like from the outside, everything can look so good, like you're absolutely crushing it. From the inside, you're white knuckling every decision, every post, every launch, waiting to be found out that you are an imposter, right?

Speaker 1 27:18

Yep.

Speaker 27:19

But again, this isn't a business problem.

unknown 27:21

Yep.

Speaker 27:22

It's a self-love problem and a safety problem. And I don't even like to call it a problem because the fact is, like, because it's you, you have full control over it. Yeah. Like, is that not awesome? So cool. Yeah. So at the end of the day, all we can do is simply offer the best we have to give and acknowledge that our best is good enough. We can speak and act not to be applauded, but to be whole. And that is the cure. It's love. Like the specific, radical, unsexy kind that says, I know who I am, I'm doing my best, and that is enough. Not because someone told me so, but because I know it to be true. So good. Yeah. Again, you're the only version of you this world will ever get. So don't give it a copy. Go all in. Play full out. Have fun. Do the things you want to do.

Speaker 1 28:12

Yeah. That's so good. Um, do you mind if I wrap up with a story then?

Speaker 28:17

No, I'd love a story, but I also want to mention our event before we close.

Speaker 1 28:21

Go ahead, mention the event.

Speaker 28:23

Um, so I do Epic Live 2026 is coming up May 28th, 29th, and 30th. And so far I'm planning on telling another fairy tale. That's awesome. Which is awesome. But we are gonna go further and deeper into this uh 90 or 80 percent, whatever you want to call it, of the part that's missing for business owners. And I'm sure we'll dive into the same AI. We'll have hot seats and of course the campfires and the hot springs and probably the horses and all the fun that comes with that. But really the people that show up are the ones that are tired of being copies and they're ready to be originals.

Speaker 1 29:02

Yeah, and that's so good because we have so many originals there, which is amazing.

Speaker 29:05

www.idoethiclive.com. Grab a ticket while you can.

Speaker 1 29:11

Yeah, can't wait to see you there.

Speaker 29:13

All right, let's hear your story.

Entrepreneurship: Mindset Before Tactics

Speaker 1 29:14

All right, so uh I'll never forget my grandmother told me this story about being, you know, I was struggling with a situation in my life and just being me and at this time. And uh she said, I want to tell you a story about your grandfather. And I was like, Okay, share the story with me, you know. And my grandma was so sweet and so nice and so lovable. And so she sat me down and she goes, I want to tell you a story that before your grandpa passed away, he really wanted to buy this really nice car. It was like a dream for him to have this car, and so we decided to do that, and um we got the car, and we left one night to go to a function, and on the way home, um your grandfather saw this calf that was struggling and dying, and he stopped and he got out in his suit, went out there, got the calf, threw the calf in his brand new car, took it home, and warmed this calf up to save its life. The next day, his best friend came over to visit him, and his best friend had seen the mess in the house of all the dirt and different things there, and then um found out that my grandfather put this calf in his brand new car and just started lighting into my grandpa, and my grandfather looked at him and said And the gentleman's name was Burton, he said, Burton, thank you. You know, I know I had a perfectly good pickup to go get him. I could have came home, changed my clothes, and did all that. But he said, I just really realized who bought the car. And I just wanted to pour the love back into them, and that calf had every right to be in the car, and that was just who authentically I was is to show up for them. And even though I got my suit dirty and it has to be, you know, taken to the cleaners and the car can be cleaned, but that little calf's alive today because I took that action, and so you know, it was just a really good story for me to and I I've thought about it so many times in my life that when somebody's in need or when something's happening, am I gonna be my authentic self or am I gonna go home and get the pickup and then come back and try to take care of the problem in a roundabout way, if that makes sense. So beautiful story. So hopefully that was good for you guys out there, and hopefully it helped you as much as it helped me. We're so grateful for you listening to the podcast. We ask you if you'll give it five stars, that helps us a ton. And if you'll share it with somebody else, that really helps us a lot too. And if you have anything that you want input or like, you know, send us on the thing, please let us know. Email us. We love that, we love your information. And if you ever want to be on the podcast and you have something to talk about, let us know that too. And this segment brought to you by I Do Epic.