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We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny
Welcome to We Play Full Out!
We’re Bart and Sunny Miller, founders of We Play Full Out, creators of We Play Full Out Life Mastery, and real-life partners who’ve built multiple 7-figure businesses by living one core truth:
You don’t get the life you want by waiting. You get it by designing it - and then showing up for it full out.
This podcast is where we strip it all down. Every week, we crack open the stories, patterns, and inner saboteurs keeping high-level entrepreneurs stuck - and give you the mindset, emotional clarity, and psychological firepower to architect your life by design.
We blend myth, mastery, identity work, and brutally honest perspective shifts to help you stop playing small and start showing up like the version of you who was born to lead.
This isn’t self-help fluff. This podcast is for those ready to face their shadow, own their power, and build a life that matches the size of their soul.
You don’t need more motivation. You need a mirror and a map.
We bring both.
We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny
Authenticity Isn't a Personality - It's a Practice
What if the version of you you’re most proud of… doesn’t exist yet—but already lives inside you?
In this episode, we unpack the lie that “authenticity” means staying true to your personality. The truth? Your personality was likely shaped by past pain, cultural conditioning, and default emotional patterns—not your highest potential. And calling that “authentic” is keeping you stuck.
Using neuroscience, mirror neurons, and real-world examples from entrepreneurs who’ve built Magnetic Identities, we explore how to stop mistaking familiar for real—and how to choose, activate, and embody the traits of your future self now.
You’ll learn why traits like confidence, boldness, and leadership feel magnetic—not because you lack them, but because your soul recognizes them. They're dormant, not missing.
If you’ve ever worried that stepping into your next level would make you “fake,” this episode will flip that belief on its head—and give you the tools to become the most intentional, powerful version of you yet.
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Welcome to. We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny Miller. Take it away, Sunny.
Speaker 2:You know, bart, everyone is chasing authenticity, but most of us confuse it with comfort. Now, as a man of many hats, it'd be awesome if you could talk a little bit about how you've been able to go from cowboy to cycling, to bodybuilding, to pickleball, take on all these new identities that most people would be like. Oh, that's just not me. I can't do that.
Speaker 1:Okay. So for me, how I look at it is is when I get excited about something, I want to dive into the culture, and what I mean by that is is that every like cycling has a different language than pickleball Roping has a different language. Right, there's a full culture around it that is so different the way they dress certain things, they say certain keywords, all that kind of stuff. So when I, when I decide to create a new alter ego or a new identity for myself or we call that a magnetic character, I really start to study everything about that culture.
Speaker 2:It's like yeah, but Bart, you're a cowboy, so it's not authentic to be a cyclist.
Speaker 1:Well, it's like saying I'm an American, therefore I shouldn't go to Japan and understand the culture, right? I think it's something that we're misled, that we have to be one thing and we have to identify, but as soon as we label ourselves, that's a really, really slippery slope, believe it or not. So for me, it's like I don't identify as anything. That's the one thing I get really frustrated, and you've heard me about this before. We're not Democrats or Republicans, we're Americans.
Speaker 2:What about just humans?
Speaker 1:We're just humans. Exactly right, you see what I'm saying. That's exactly it. So for me it really is diving into the culture, diving into a new identity, creating a new magnetic self that fits into that, and at first it's rough.
Speaker 2:Well, but what do you think has enabled you to be that way? Because I know it's really easy to anchor into. This is who I am. Therefore, I can't explore anything else yeah, I just, I don't know.
Speaker 1:It's fun for me and it's kind of like we. You know we've told the story about dozer before. If you haven't heard that right, you don't know what you are until you try something you know, you tell that story again really quick, just for those who haven't heard it okay. So we had this amazing bulldog. His His name was Dozer, and so cool, raised our kids, everything like that, but a lot of times he would just stay in the house.
Speaker 2:He was a lazy dog, I would say If you've owned a bulldog. He has like 10 seconds of energy and then he's wiped out on the floor for like three hours just to recover from that.
Speaker 1:Totally so. One day I had this steer that was just being absolutely nasty and it was being mean and heck, and sunny came out to see if I was okay, and that dog came out with her because he loves sunny. So we get out there and all of a sudden that dog is in the middle of the pen with me and absolutely on this steer we've seen a side of him that we had never, ever seen. I mean, we've seen this dog with little tiny babies and they're pulling at his face and they're jumping on top of them, all these things. He wouldn't bite a freaking flea, but yet all of a sudden he's in the mix of it like full on bulldog status. It was crazy, right. But he had never known that side of him, had he never ever put himself in that ecosystem?
Speaker 1:And that's the way I feel with me is like I don't know what all my talents are unless I try something. And why, why not try? Why not? Why not experience a few things? Right, that's the way I'm with foods. I may taste it and at first I like do I really hate it? Or was it just a shock to my system? You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I do.
Speaker 1:But like it's just fun for me to try things.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So in our magnetic mastermind we teach about how to create a personalized magnetic identity that allows you to, like, bypass your limiting beliefs and step into this version of you that's more powerful, I would say. In the moments that count, you can activate it right, and you taught this from stage I did so well, and what I think is interesting is like we can look and go okay, cowboy, cyclist, this, that or the other, but it's like when it comes to internal things, it's like harder to label what's holding us back yeah like you don't really see what it is like.
Speaker 2:I'm just not a speaker, maybe, right, or I'm not outgoing enough to go network at this event. Or I'm, maybe or I'm not outgoing enough to go network at this event, or I'm not this or I'm not that.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Kind of the same thing, like you've got to put a different hat on, do you?
Speaker 1:get what I'm saying. I totally do.
Speaker 2:And step into a different arena, but we don't see it, because it's not an outward display all the time.
Speaker 1:Well, and it's what we've been labeled as. And what's funny about human beings is, when we're labeled as something and we take it on, it's very easy for us to anchor to that label and say that's who I am, when reality is you really don't know that that's who you are. So, for example, like a lot of introverts, I find which is very interesting is I don't like being out, I don't like doing these things. Oh, really, do you like this subject to talk about? Well, if you want to talk about gaming and it's what I want to talk about I'm ready to talk. And what I say to that is is then you're not an introvert, don't take this wrong, but you're just don't want to have any other conversations. That could be narrow minded, it could be whatever you want to call it, but at the end of the day, you want to talk about what you want to talk about and call it, but at the end of the day, you want to talk about what you want to talk about and you're bored with other conversations. Therefore, you call yourself an introvert, which is fine, totally fine, to label yourself that way. But, um, I think, uh, also, as people look at like, for example, we've talked about Marilyn Monroe. She really loved a certain thing but couldn't get past some of the other things that were holding her back. So let's say, I love pickleball, but I just oh my gosh, having a paddle putting shorts on it's holding me back.
Speaker 1:Well, how do I bridge that gap? That's what we're really talking about here, and how you bridge that gap is by creating a new persona that you step into, that you look up to, that have the characteristics that you want. And as soon as you step into that, you look up to that, have the characteristics that you want. And as soon as you step into that identity, it changes the game. And I always challenge men all the time like guys, look, if you don't believe this to be true, I double dog.
Speaker 1:Dare you, first of all, to wear a dress one day? I know, I know, but do it on Halloween, so nobody catches on and just see if you don't change. Is it still the same? You, yes. Are you still dressed up? Yes, but you will. I absolutely, when your kids see you or friends see you change who you are that you would never, ever step into in your normal. But it's still, you believe it or not. And so it's challenging.
Speaker 1:But I know, as we step into certain things in the right environments and environment is the key here it will absolutely help you. So you asked me one of the things like when I start cycling, for example, I don't just ride here and go get my cowboy buddies and tell them I'm riding. I go find the tribe that fits me, go there, dress like them and guess what? I don't feel that peer pressure. I don't feel that difference. I don't feel that peer pressure. I don't feel that difference. I don't feel all the things. And that's one of the things that really helps you bridge that gap is your environment that you're in when you are in that character, right, because if I showed up and had all my my rodeo buddies and I rode out to the arena and I walk into my spandex, it's probably going to be a little tougher to become a cyclist the way I want to, for sure, okay, anyway, don't know if that helps.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it does, so you taught all of this on stage at Funnel. Hacking Live.
Speaker 1:Yep.
Speaker 2:And I'm always fascinated by the people that come up and say well, isn't that just being fake, right? Like that's not authentic, like you are just like pulling the wool over people's eyes if you are trying to be something that you're not. So that's kind of what we're talking about today. So that's kind of what we're talking about today, like if you don't understand the psychology behind creating this version of yourself that you can step into, then you can look at it as fake.
Speaker 1:Well, you could also look at people who have multiple personalities. Yeah, they're not human. Now, I just throw that out there, because they can switch from personality to personality.
Speaker 2:And so can I. Yeah, exactly, and that's the question that I I like to ask people to consider is like, if you're hiding, if you're not using your voice, if you're not playing as big as you can, if you're not doing all of those things, does that mean that that's you being authentic or not being authentic? You get what I'm saying, I totally do, and for me it's you being authentic or not being authentic.
Speaker 1:You get what I'm saying. I totally do, and for me it's.
Speaker 2:You're being unauthentic yeah, well, that's what we're getting at here. So you know, this is just how I am. That's just not me. I'm not the type to those are all labels first of all, they're all labels. And second is, like we were talking earlier about dozer how do you know, right, how do you know that's not you totally so I would say that those are all emotional habits in disguise, it's good, it's really good. Real authenticity isn't about staying loyal to those patterns. We've all got them right.
Speaker 1:We do.
Speaker 2:We've been taught, like you just said, that your character or your personality is fixed. But most of us are living like, with default personalities. But most of us are living like with default personalities our culture, our environment, how we were raised, what we were taught, like all of these things, the labels we were given by other people, that just kind of stuck. That's default personality. That's not intentional, like you didn't even create that, it just happened.
Speaker 1:Well, we say it all the time your personality is your personal reality, so like if you were raised somewhere else, your personality would be a different personal reality because of what you came from.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so do you really want to stay loyal to the traits that you have that aren't serving you? Right, right, so we would say that being authentic is actually choosing who you want to be and stepping into that that's exactly right. Right and then showing up that way before it feels comfortable. Like I guarantee you, when you showed up on your first bike ride, you weren't comfortable. It was different.
Speaker 1:I mean, you know, you go from wearing pants like this to wearing spandex and your wife's looking at you like what in the world? I've never seen you in something like this before, right? And then your kids are giving you a bad time. And then you've got these cleats on that are a totally different style of cowboy boot and then you head out on a different type of horse. That's way different. You know, yeah, so it's way out of your comfort zone. But what I find is your net worth and your network expands when you're able to expand. Yeah, all of a sudden I met people. I would have I mean amazing humans, but I would have never met them in the world, the rodeo world, just not where they're at.
Speaker 2:I mean another layer of that too, those you're showing up for a ride. Guys have been riding for years. You're the first guy you're gonna get dropped yeah, there's a lot to that. Oh, there's a lot of stress putting on the clothes and showing amen plus, you're still the outsider a little bit that's right you got to kind of prove yourself oh boy for years um, kind of going back to the analogy of the outward versus the inward.
Speaker 2:It's kind of like if you were to say, like I want to get toned up, I want to get in shape, I'm going to go to the gym and somebody's saying, oh well, you're not currently that way, so that's not you, you can't do it right. But internally we take that on as like I can't do it because it makes me nervous, or I can't do it because you know what, if somebody sees me? Or it's so strange to me that, like the outward and the inward are so different, like we don't allow people to change inwardly, but outwardly we're like, okay, cool, like go do that. Yeah, you know so true.
Speaker 1:And here's another thing right, if you go back to a certain ecosystem, even if you have tried to change?
Speaker 2:yeah.
Speaker 1:People will try to drag you back.
Speaker 2:They won't let you fast. They're like no, this is you, that's not you.
Speaker 1:That's right, and they'll try to brag you back, so be careful of that too. Yeah, that's really important.
Speaker 2:So creating an intentional personality, defining and shaping your character, is a wonderful and vital act of love for yourself.
Speaker 1:And it's so fun.
Speaker 2:It really is. It's authentic to the core.
Speaker 1:Yeah, fun it really is.
Speaker 2:It's authentic to the core. Yeah, because it's who you want to be. Yeah, right, and so is. Debbie ford said, if you admire something in someone else, it's because it exists in you. Otherwise you wouldn't be able to see it so good. So, kind of going back. Um well, neuroscience has shown that we have mirror neurons in our brains. Right, we talk about this a little bit the fire when we perform an action or when we watch somebody else take an action, which is why you flinch when somebody stubs their toe. But the deeper truth is, you can't mirror something you don't have potential for. So if I see something in you that I admire, that means the potential lives inside of me too.
Speaker 2:I'll never forget like Eileen Wilder came and did a little training for our group one day and the first thing she did was have us all just sit down and think about somebody who we really look up to, or a leader, something to that effect and then she had us write down the traits that we saw in that person.
Speaker 2:Then she turned it around and said that's you yeah and at the time like it was a new concept to me and it really blew my mind. I was like, wow, what I see in others actually lives inside of me if I allow it to grow and to activate it and to use that in my life yeah, good example, yeah, yeah no-transcript are yeah, and then they, they embody it, yep, right so true yep anything you want to say about that no, I just think it's one of the coolest processes I've ever watched humans go through.
Speaker 1:When they actually start to go through this process, and if they fully engage with it, the transformations are off the charts. Cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So what you're drawn to is not random. It's a reflection of what's already coded inside of you. And there's the analogy of the acorn tree. Right, you would take an acorn seed and you'd never say you're never going to be a tree. It's like, no, it's already got coding, it's already got a blueprint, it's already got the roots and the branch and everything inside of it.
Speaker 1:It's just watering it putting it out in the sun letting it grow.
Speaker 2:We don't know all the time what lives inside of us, which is why you know it can be so constrictive if you live your life in a way of I'm just this and never explore anything else, never step into anything else, never choose and be intentional about what you want to become.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I really feel it's important right here. So I just want to give you guys kind of a thought process. But there was this little boy. I was at this event and he had wrote all of these beliefs on this board, right, and he had to step up to this board and punch the board and actually break it and he was scared to death to break this board. Can you blame him? Now? Imagine the emotion, everything going inside of him. He had a leader sitting there next to him and it's just like the little guy was crying. His mom and dad came over crying.
Speaker 2:Nobody knew what to do.
Speaker 1:Nobody knew what to do and the poor little dude wanted to break the board. So I went over to him and I said, hey, can I ask you a question? He goes yeah, I go. Who's your favorite Marvel character? And he goes Hulk. I'm like Hulk, yeah, can you be Hulk for a second? He goes yeah, I go. What would Hulk do if he was to actually be in front of that board right now? Hit, hulk, smash it. I said we'll be Hulk for a second. Hulk, smash it. He changed his. I mean, you would have thought he was a totally different kid. Change stepped up there. Hulk, yeah, his whole body changed, his energy changed. He just Hulk, smash Bam, broke the board and everybody went crazy. Now ask yourself what changed. Was it a different person? Was he Hulk? Was he different, I mean? But he stepped into that new identity and instantly found a new level of himself. It was so. It's exactly what we're talking about. But it lived inside of him. He had the power the entire time.
Speaker 2:Well, if he didn't, he couldn't have done it.
Speaker 1:Exactly, but imagine what that would have done to his psyche had he had walked away.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Not breaking that board, yeah. Would he ever step back in and say, no, this lives inside of me, when it really truly did?
Speaker 2:Now in a young age, to have that anchored would be Crazy, different trajectory.
Speaker 1:Totally.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all right, so kind of like we're not going to go through our whole magnetic character creation. But some things that you can start to think about is where in your life are you calling something authentic when it's actually just familiar Good? What trait do you admire in others that you've been afraid to activate within yourself so good? And if you were designing the future version of yourself on purpose and with total freedom, like blank slate, what would you choose today to start and embody?
Speaker 2:remember, like it's not going to feel natural at first, you know it's just like making the choice and moving in that direction, and it should be a little comfortable.
Speaker 1:That's how growth happens is through a little bit of anxiety, believe it or not yeah, and what's funny, if you want to test it once again, halloween's a perfect time. You will not like you dress up in certain things. You're not going to feel comfortable, but go look at how much fun you can actually have. Just experience it.
Speaker 2:It's crazy cool so you don't need to fake it till you make it.
Speaker 1:You just need to wake it till you shape it.
Speaker 2:But playing full out doesn't mean being perfect, it means showing up on purpose.
Speaker 1:Yeah, right Amen.
Speaker 2:Choosing to lead with the version of you that's aligned with your vision, not with your history.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and in here I'm really starting to get to where, like in the, we play full out. It's like taking on challenges that actually put pressure on you and, believe it or not, that is the fastest way to grow. So, for example, if Sonny and I were like we don't know if we should cold plunge, we would challenge ourselves like okay, we're doing this, we're trying it Right, cause we play full out. So to me, playing full out is like why not? Why not? Let's explore.
Speaker 2:Well, and we just have been reading the book Comfort Crisis in our I Do Epic group and it really is along the lines of get out of your comfort zone. That's only place the growth happens. So it is, you know, playing full out is being intentional about showing up but also being ready for that.
Speaker 1:Yep, cause we sure love to be comfortable.
Speaker 2:We do, I do.
Speaker 1:We all do.
Speaker 2:All right, that's all I got for today.
Speaker 1:That's it. That's it. We are on the life updates.
Speaker 2:We are.
Speaker 1:Let's go. What you got for life updates.
Speaker 2:I actually don't have any?
Speaker 1:None, I'm so tired, oh my gosh. So life updates. Let's think Xander has been driving the Jeep because the other car he has, a Malibu, couldn't start, so the battery had an issue and we haven't got out.
Speaker 2:So now he gets to take mom's Jeep, which he calls his Jeep at school. Yeah, yeah exactly.
Speaker 1:It's funny how that changes right so easily, decorates it a little different. It takes the things down. Gotta look more manly, yeah. But uh, so that's one life update. Sonny and I have played a little bit of pickleball this week. We went and had some friends Chad big shout out to you and his son texted us, wanted us to play. We wouldn't play. It had a good time. Mercedes made candles. Today we got to see Little Lila, which was absolutely awesome. Yep, and what else.
Speaker 2:We'll be playing tonight.
Speaker 1:Pickleball tonight and I went in. I roped on my horses this week, which was a lot of fun. I think that's really the biggest life updates that we can share with you right now today. I think that's really the biggest life updates that we can share with you right now today. So just want you guys to think about if you don't share the podcast, it doesn't get anybody's ears to listen to it. Then we're not playing full out. So please share the podcast if you like this segment. And then also, we're super stoked about our event. We've got it all planned out. The through lines are planned out. We had our first meeting on everything that's going to be happening at the event.
Speaker 1:So if you're considering that or if you're listening to this a different time, we may have an event coming up. Go check that out. It's a party, it's always a party, and we are so freaking grateful for you as the listener. We understand that there's multiple people right that listen to this from a different perspective and we hope that you're getting value. If there is something that you want us to talk about, please let us know. We cannot read your mind, Sorry. So please do that and then have the awesome just an absolute awesome day. And then do Sonny and I a big favor Send out five gratitude texts to somebody for us. Just tell them how grateful, how awesome they are. It might be your kid, it might be a significant other, it might just be a friend, but if they pop in your mind, send five gratitude texts for us. We would greatly appreciate that, and I think that's a wrap. So this segment is brought to you by. I Do Epic.
