We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny

Your Comfort Zone Isn’t as Safe as You Think with Russell and Collette Brunson

• Bart and Sunny Miller • Season 1 • Episode 61

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In this episode of We Play Full Out, we’re diving into what it really takes to break free from the limits we put on ourselves and expand our capacity to handle life’s challenges with ease and fulfillment. And guess what? We’ve got some incredible company—Russell and Collette Brunson join us as co-hosts to share their insights and personal experiences on stepping outside of comfort zones and leaning into growth.

We talk about the power of embracing tension, how to shift your mindset to normalize the hard things, and why the key to a more fulfilling life isn’t avoiding discomfort—it’s learning to expand your capabilities so that what once felt impossible becomes second nature.

If you’ve ever felt stuck or overwhelmed by the weight of your goals, this episode will give you the perspective and strategies you need to push forward with confidence.

Get ready to challenge your limits and start playing full out!

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Bart:

Welcome to. We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny Miller. Just kidding, today we have some special guests. We have Russell and Colette Brunson with Bart and Sunny Miller. Take it away, sunny.

Sunny:

Bart had the microphone.

Russell:

With four guests, we're holding the microphones weird right.

Sunny:

Yes, we're all holding microphones. Welcome, Russell and Colette Brunson. We are so excited to have you join our conversation today. It's going to get real.

Russell:

Real and raw. We're excited.

Sunny:

Heck. Yeah, we are All right. We're going to start with a little story and I wrote it out, but really it happened to you, bart, so I think I'll let you tell the story about when you and James Billman rolled into Las Vegas, nevada, and what happened. All you and James Billman rolled into Las Vegas.

Bart:

Nevada. And what happened? All right, well, imagine this. We were in Wickenburg, arizona, we had just got done roping and we were exhausted, and Wickenburg is about three hours out of Las Vegas, nevada. So we wanted to go rope in Vegas so we could win a new truck, trailer and a half a million dollars.

Russell:

Did you win?

Bart:

it.

Sunny:

Let's go.

Bart:

That's not part of the story. And a half a million dollars, let's go. That's not part of the story. So, uh, we get traveling over there and our buddy lives not too far off the strip and so we had this gated house which we didn't know. So we go pulling up there. We don't know exactly which house it is. There's these beautiful houses on both sides of the road. So we get there.

Bart:

It's dark, we're tired, and he opens the gates up to this beautiful place and we're like oh, how do we get a 45 foot trailer and truck in here? So well, the only way you can do it is to back straight up. Then, all of a sudden, you swing a little wider to get in. That makes a lot of sense. I know listening to it. But as we started to back up, I had this feeling which, by the way, if you ever have that feeling, just act upon it. So I had this feeling of like, should I just get out and pay attention to what you're backing up? And he's like no, I seen everything, we're good. So James starts backing the truck up, which was fine.

Bart:

As soon as he went to pull to the right, to pull in, he didn't happen to see that there was a small but large garbage dumpster there, one of the metal dumpsters. And all of a sudden we started hearing noise clear down the side of the trailers that scraping hits the awning and just yeah, exactly Dramatic effects by. Russell Brunson just crunches and I'm like what just happened. He looks at me like what just happened. So we get out of the truck only to find this garbage dumpster, the trailer, destroyed. We can't move the gut not destroyed, but like all the panel on the side was torn up and we couldn't move the garbage so heavy. There's three guys we're trying to manhandle this thing. We couldn't do it, so we had to get a skidster, lift it up, move it off of there, pull in and get set up for the night to be ready to rope. And I could even tell you more stories that happened in the same scenario that night, but that was the one I think you're referring to.

Sunny:

Yes, it is. Thank you for that thrilling story part. Okay, well, james reaction.

Bart:

James, reaction was no big deal. You know, like this is fixable, no problem.

Sunny:

So yeah, so James is a welder and he's got a knack for fixing things, so he kind of shrugged it off, maybe had a few choice words in the moment, but the damage was probably at least $10,000 for somebody who doesn't have the skill set that James has. So for someone younger or less experienced, this could have been a devastating situation, but for James it was just another bump in the road, kind of an ah well, another day, another project for him. And that leads us to an interesting conclusion how much trauma you experience from an event depends on who you were before the event occurred. For James, the trailer repairs were a challenge, but they weren't devastating because of who he was in that moment. So, when it comes to playing full out, how do you build the strength and capacity and capability to handle life's challenges with resilience, and how do we unlock our personal power and use it to uplift others then on the journey?

Bart:

So I mean, what comes to my mind is mentorship, and I think Russell can jump in on this too. I mean, obviously you've been a mentor to me, but like, sometimes our capacity comes through who's around us. So like, if that would have happened to me and I know James, he'd probably be the first one I call, cause I'm like dude just destroyed my trailer. You know what I'm saying. And then I would have leaned on his mentorship to be able to say dude, just take a few breaths. I know where I can get this, I know how to handle this situation. You know, like I'll walk you through it. Everything's going to be okay. But so many times I think we forget that. But through mentorship, I think that's one way. Um, you have some ideas.

Russell:

In my business there's always ups and downs all the time, right, and it's funny because some of the things that I have to work through on a daily basis nowadays the problem comes like, oh, it's fine, but I think about 10 years ago or five years ago, if that thing would have happened, it would have completely crushed me, right? And you think about this so much of I think life is about as you're going along, you're learning things and you're increasing your capacity and you learn some more to increase your capacity. And, um, I think, for the most part, god doesn't give us trials and problems that we can't handle. You know, sometimes we look at him like this is too big, I can't handle this, and then somehow we get through it, you know. But I think that that those things are all like all the, all the trials, all the problems, all the things that happen are there to increase your capacity.

Russell:

So next time you can handle more and you can handle more over time, and so I think that's a big part of it is just, first off, realizing there's nothing you you're given that you can't actually do, but then like it's preparing you for the next thing, which is probably gonna be bigger and probably gonna be bigger. You know, we were talking during dinner tonight about our big event coming up in like two and a half weeks. That came to me right, we're two and a half million dollars over budget and again, um, I was like well, that sucks, okay, and we spent like an hour where we figured out a couple ways to try to figure it out, whereas, like, yeah, on our first event or our second event, two and a half million dollars in the hole was more than everything times 100. Like it would have been impossible. And so I think a lot of it is just like life is about like going through problems, increasing your capacity so you can have the next one and keep going through that.

Bart:

You know what I mean. Yeah, increase your capacity so you can have the next one and keep going through that. You know what I mean. Yeah, I totally do, so you know. One thing that also struck me in this is how many times in our personal lives like when we had our first kid or, for example you know, you've talked about this from stage, I know I can say it, but it's like when you guys were trying to have kids Like what happens? Then all of a sudden you know there's like this, this happens, and all of a sudden you're dealing with something in your family and you're just like our kid is so sick or this or that. You know how do you gain that ability sometimes to just not panic, freak out, make that the worst time of your life, versus looking at it and saying, okay, that was not fun, but I was able to grow my capacity to be able to deal with this in a different way.

Russell:

It's funny. I have a friend, friends who are about to have their very first kids. They're like so stressed out, so worried and everything. I'm like, okay, this is the deal. We were stressed out too. But like, when the first kid comes, then they sleep like 20 hours the first day and you're like, oh, this is not that bad. And then the next day and next day you know they're walking and they're taught to be like. You know it creeps into it over time. So like you work your way into it so it's not quite as scary as you. A lot of times the fear of the thing coming up is way bigger than what actually happens, you know.

Bart:

Yeah, and I think that's another point you're bringing up. Is that? How do I say it? Like we always go, I think, to the worst of worst case scenarios sometimes in our heads, instead of just saying maybe it's not as bad as I think it is, but as humans I think that's one of our natures, right? Is we instantly go, whoa, and I mean even us. We're like okay, we have no awning, can we get this? You know, all these things go through your head so quickly, but it's just how you, how you learn to mentally just step, take a few breaths, think it through and move on.

Sunny:

I love it. This is going right where we need it to go, guys. Thank you.

Russell:

I thought of one other thing to add yes, please, this is something I don't know. If you remember UPW, the first time Tony Robbins talked about this and he was talking about how their team was doing this big event and it was like 25,000 people coming to it and all the problems and the government trying to shut down and all these things, you know, they were so stressed out and Tony was, and the whole team's freaking out. Tony stopped everyone and was like wait a minute, you guys, we have 25,000 people trying to come to an event. We would have died for this problem when we got started. Now it's here Like yes, it sucks and all this stuff, but like this is insane that we're like we've been blessed with this problem to solve and it's like such a cool, cool, cool thing.

Sunny:

Sometimes it really is. Sometimes it's just that perception shift and as soon as you've got it, man, you're way better than you were before.

Bart:

Right, we would have died as kids to have 145, you know thousand dollar horse trailer we're pulling, let alone worry about scratching it.

Russell:

I was like we're staying in what you know, like in perspective, you know, yeah, good problem to have, well, I?

Sunny:

was even thinking, you know, with the kid analogy. You know, now we're grandparents, yeah, and we went to the hospital and we see Mercedes with our little baby and we're just walking away with big smiles on our face.

Sunny:

We're like, oh, the journey that she's in on and we get to just like cuddle the baby and go home and not have any of that. But it's definitely like a process with progress. But we're going to kind of switch a little bit. We're coming back to the same thing about increasing our capacity as humans and how we can intentionally do that in the areas that we really want to grow in, but maybe our energy is blocked in those areas. So at the start of this new year I feel like lately every year there's like a poll for me to study a new topic that's really going to increase my growth. That year, last year for me was shadow work and I learned so much about projection and about our shadows and about how to integrate that into our life. This year I told Bart, like it's energy, like I really need to study energy, and it kind of started in little increments.

Sunny:

Like at the end of last year I was listening to a book by Dr James Hollis called A Life of Meaning, exploring Our Deepest Questions and Motivations, and in this book Dr Hollis talks about how energy is a vital indicator of personal alignment and purpose. And I think we all kind of know, you know, you hear the sayings like pursue the things that set your soul on fire, or self-care. You know what are the things that really excite you, like, follow those. And there's a lot of truth to that. When we're engaged in pursuits that resonate with our true selves, we experience that natural flow of energy and that does lead to fulfillment and that does lead to vitality and it does make us feel more alive. If we don't, then we can be energy depleted, we can be fatigued, we can be drained, burned out and we can feel really stuck. Dr Hollis really urged in the book to pay attention to these energy patterns and I started thinking, like, just on a day to day basis, am I paying attention to, like things that are making me happy or things that are draining me? Like how in tune with that am I really being? And I really discovered that I'm not being, that you know, like I'm not self-aware as much as I'd like to be. Um, and then I started thinking about, but like, let's say you want to pursue something, maybe something does excite you, but there's fear blocking you or there's just like those energy blocks that's preventing you from following down the path. You feel like you need to go on? And what if we're too scared to break free from old patterns and chase the things that we deeply desire?

Sunny:

So, oddly enough, after I chose the topic of energy as my theme for the year, I opened up Facebook. It was literally like three days after the new year and there was a post right there in front of me by one of our friends. Her name's Nin Dean I hope I said her name right and she had this post about how she had listened to the same book 10 times on Audible and, like I had the Audible badge, she's like I didn't know there was a badge for this, but I listened to this book 10 times and it gave me, like this listener badge. And of course, she doesn't say what the book is open loop or whatever. So I'm like, okay, I know it's like what is that book? Like I need to know. So you scroll down a little and she says the name of the book is Energy Rising and I'm like, hmm, synchronicities are very real. So I'm going to follow down that path and I got the book is called Energy Rising by Dr Julia, and I can't say her last name, so I'm not going to try.

Sunny:

But the premise is really simple and is to reach your full potential, you must learn to recognize and harness the energy within your brain.

Sunny:

And this Dr Julia is a neuroscientist, so she talks about how, like all of our energy are just little you know, pulses throughout our brain, little synapses making little I don't know energetic, electrical clicks in our brain. When you start viewing life less about what you do and more about the natural energies within and around you, your power to live and lead with impact grows exponentially. And that brings us back to kind of James' story and kind of all the things we were talking about. How do we become the kind of people who can handle life's inevitable challenges without crumbling and also like, how do we grow into who and what we want to be and kind of be accountable for our lives and what our purpose is? And the answer lies in growth. And the hard truth is that growth requires pain. And I've been talking a lot, so if you guys have any thoughts so far, my first thought real quick, are you going to win the competition?

Russell:

You can listen to the book 11 times so you can get the new badge.

Bart:

Sorry, right, totally Get that new badge. So one thought came to me is is that, uh, one of the things that Sunny didn't realize, I think, earlier on, but finally did come to the capacity on energy, was how she loves to go for walks in nature and she would come back after she went on a walk in nature and it was like I'm married to a whole different lady. But when she doesn't get this walk in, it's like what's going on and we both back then were not in tune with the energetic state of what that was doing for you. But once we both had that aha moment, it was like I'm pushing you out the door every day saying get on this walk, just go find this energy, because it fulfilled you so much. You want to talk about that at all, or you know anything about that?

Sunny:

No, it's true, and it's winter time, so you're probably ready to kill me because I haven't been out for my walk and I really need it.

Bart:

So other things, too, that I find that that build energy. If you, if you don't know your energetic capacities, things that you want to look at is music. What kind of music do you listen to that brings you energy? And we have Russell here right now, so I'll bring this up. He finds energy through books, or some sort of books, or there's something about the smell of a book, or there's. Well, I'm serious, though I'm so weird. Well, weird, weird or not weird. It must do something to your energetic system that brings you energy, do you?

Russell:

remember what's the Netflix girl that does the laundry and she organizes stuff.

Collette:

Oh, oh, my gosh.

Russell:

Where she's always like. Does this bring you joy, Like the feng shui?

Collette:

Yes, marie Marie.

Russell:

Condo or something like that.

Collette:

Oh my gosh, you're so good. Yes, how do you have that? I don't know, it just popped in my head. Okay, but what did?

Russell:

you say Because you dealt with our houses, does this bring any joy?

Collette:

Right. So if you are cleansing out your closet, or whatever you're doing right. But you want to hold on to this stuff because it has meaning or something. I don't know of it, and you say thank you for serving me, now go serve somebody else and so you give it gratitude right and move on.

Russell:

So that's good. As a hoarder, I'm the opposite, where I'm like that gave someone else joy, now I want it. But no, I think it's interesting Cause, like um, I thought about that especially during my days where it's like, man, there's things I do in the day that I don't love, that I like I dread it, and there's things that I could do for a million hours and never get tired and just keep running and stuff like that. And so my thing is always like how can I be spending my entire day doing things I like and not things I don't like? And then finding people, because what's interesting about humans, I think is cool, is there's things that I would rather die than do, but somebody else on my team would love that. And so it's like how do I surround myself with people who my my energy sucks, their energy gains, and I can have them do things, and that way it's like we're all able to focus on, like where we're actually the best at, you know, and so for me, it's like my favorite part of the day.

Russell:

I love finding these books and getting them and reading it, and like those things get me so excited that like it fires me up and gives me ideas to talk about and content and like all the other things that come from it. And yeah, and then there's other things I said that are really hard. It's like man, who, who would love this? Who are the people? And I look at people, my team. They do some of the jobs. I like I would rather die than do this and like are you kidding me? This is like my dream. I'm like are you insane? This is horrible and so I don't know. I think that's one of the lessons I learned in business that's been helpful is just figuring out things you love and figure out your strengths and doubling down on those and not focusing on your weaknesses, like finding people who can energetically take those things and that way, as a whole, you're able to grow together.

Bart:

I don't know. I love that. I think another thing too in my life is some of the things I like to say. I want to play pickleball but I suck, you know, and you're going to suck at something at the very beginning. But how, when you're sucking, can you find energy in it to where you can grow with it and actually grow the capacity of your energy through that? So you know, there's some things I think you're going to hit on on that too, right, all right, there's a setup.

Sunny:

I like it, I like it. There we go. Okay, kind of going back to the premise, like, growth does require pain, whether we like it or not, and too often we stay stuck in comfortable patterns, or AKA the comfort zone, because we're waiting for the perfect outcome. We think it shouldn't require any struggle or discomfort, but that's not how reality works. It always comes with some sort of level of pain. I think this was really eyeopening for me, like we were talking earlier about relationships and about we've been married for almost 30 years and how do we do it? You know, and you know there's certain things that we cycle back on regularly, that we have been stuck in for so long and we've been so sick of it. And this really opened my eyes to the fact of you know what. There's not a perfect outcome here. It's going to require some pain, and once you start to realize that I'm going to get into a little bit more of that here you can move forward understanding that.

Sunny:

So, if you think about lifting weights, when you first start, even a 10 pound dumbbell feels heavy. In fact, I know what are the what's that Shoulders. When I first went to the gym I could only do five pounds, like that was it. And, um, I was still sore from doing that and sometimes you're sore for days. But you keep showing up that same weight starts to feel lighter and you gradually start to increase the resistance as your capacity grows to lift that weight. And so you know, if you want to start lifting more weight and more weight, you kind of go through the same process. You take up the next increment of weights and you're sore and it hurts and all the things, but eventually you can get up to lifting 50 pounds or more. And then you look back at that little weight and you're laughing at it that that was ever even hard.

Sunny:

And the funny thing about it is when you're lifting 50 pounds you're still carrying that initial 10 pounds of weight. Like the weight and the tension of that 10 pounds hasn't disappeared, but your strength has grown so much that it barely feels like a challenge anymore. So, like in our relationship, when we've had talks and you finally start to realize like it's going to take some pain, like we're not the same person, your views are different than my views. Um, maybe I'm going to have to grow and morph a little and start to accept things that I may not have accepted in the past and maybe that's going to be painful for me. But as I start to lean into that, as I start to kind of like put the tension and the pressure on, then my capacity to handle that will grow. Not that maybe it ever really goes away, but it's not a challenge for me anymore.

Bart:

Yeah.

Sunny:

Makes sense.

Bart:

A hundred percent. I think that's really important too is because in relationship or in business partnerships or whatever it is, I think the one thing that we're the most scared of is conversation sometimes, which it shouldn't be, but it's hard because we don't want to have that resistance, we don't want to have that pushback, we don't want to have certain things like that that really force us to grow. So we become avoidant in that. But when you can have true conversation and really put the pressure not really put pressure on, but be open in that, that's where real growth, like you said, gets to build that muscle, to where we talk about things now that even five years ago we would have never like had been like what, for example, well, change the rating, no, but like truly, though, like it's fascinating, even on really hard topics.

Bart:

You know of what can our kids do?

Bart:

You know what all sorts of things.

Bart:

You know that we just we didn't kind of avoid it in certain things because I had a view on they have to work for it to get this, and you had a view or something different, whatever it might be. So sometimes it's just easier to avoid, but it didn't build us as a couple to where we were actually growing with each other because we desired that. But the cool part is is we come to an agreement of we want to lift weights and we're going to look at it as fun. We're not going to have the stuck energy, even though it's going to be there but we're going to root that out and put new energy into our relationship, into our marriage. And I think that sometimes one of the hardest things is to be able to look at somebody and say, hey, are you willing to put some effort and real change the energy of where we're at and see what that does for us and mix it up a little bit? At and see what that does for us and mix it up a little bit.

Russell:

I was thinking about when you said that, like I'm going back to my wrestling career. So, like wrestling, we worked out hard, we lift the weights hard, so we were always sore and a long time. A lot of times you're like, oh, I'm sore, this is miserable, or we'd go through really hard wrestling practice. We're just so tired and so beat up, or we're so thirsty, and so all the different things. I remember there was this um, this one practice. It was the end of a brutal, like a abnormally brutal practice and, um, at the end our coaches could tell that we were kind of everyone was just, it was hard, right, and so we pulled us into like what our restroom was, as a kind of a backroom is in the stairwell, so it was dark and he had us all sit on the stairs.

Russell:

My coach's name is Mark James. I remember Mark got up and he started talking about some stuff and he's like you know what's interesting he's like. He's like every day we come down here and we're all committed, we're wrestling, we're committed, we're doing these things. So we're here for the same time, no matter what he's like, you can't control that. It's like we're running practice. You can't attitude or a bad attitude. But regardless, we're doing the practice right, regardless we're going through the motion, we're going to be lifting, you're going to be sore. The only thing you can control is your attitude. And he's like, if you decide to have a positive attitude, this is not going to be that bad, but even negative it's going to be miserable. And I remember he said that and getting my plastics, getting my sweats and normally just like, oh, I gotta lose 12 pounds today before the weigh-in. You know like that's a horrible thing to think about. But then I remember, coach, what coach James said like all you can do is control your attitudes.

Russell:

I remember going down in the wrestling room and I had jump rope and no one was there yet on. And uh, the first kids come down. They're like brunson, why are you smiling? I'm just like sweating, like your hoodies and stuff and I don't know. Coach said I can control my attitude. And then some more guys come down brunson, why are you smiling? I'm like I don't know, I'm just gonna smile. So I kept smiling the whole time. By the time the whole team came in, somebody said something about it like you look, it looked like an idiot smiling or something. I was like I've never seen someone lose with a smile on their face. And then I was like oh, I was like okay, so then that rest of that practice I was so beat up I just had a smile on my face the whole time and then, by the time it was done, like it was brutal but it was awesome. And then and then for me, my wrestling career that's always my thing I can only control. My question on that is obviously we're talking about energy.

Bart:

So, that being said, how much did that increase your capacity to work out? How much more energy did you actually put out because you were happy about it?

Russell:

Oh, for sure it it that the attitude shift changes everything. Like you put more effort, you run faster, you go harder, like you don't like it just, and then and then because of that, you get better, so you win more. Like it's just, it's this like a domino effect. Yeah, that grows from there. But did the pain go away? No, and that, and it's funny now I enjoy it, like even a workout. Now I'm sore, I'm like, oh, I feel so good to be sore, like now I crave it.

Bart:

You know that's a great example, and I think that's also the beauty of it is is that, like you said, the only thing you control is your attitude, which controls your energetic state. You can control. If you get that energy straight higher, then what does that bring to your family? What does that bring to your team? What does that bring to you, as you know everything? And then what's your output levels? They're just that much higher because you're the one. And what's so funny about that and I know you know this because I've been around you a lot- and that is, it's contagious as I'll get out.

Russell:

I mean energy is you think about that? It's like that's why a lot of times it's called the vibe, like the vibration. And I think about this, like with you know tuning forks, you have different tuning forks and like they'll sync to the same level. So Dave Woodward and I used to have this conversation a lot, so, so, like when we'd walk in the office, because you walk in the office and the employees and the team are just like, they're kind of whatever vibe they showed up at right Yep. And so either me or Dave like, hey, we walk in there.

Russell:

If we walk in there, like wherever else is out, we'll kind of settle. If we come in depressed or sad, like everyone's going to sing to us, I'm like, but we come in on fire, everyone's going to rise to us, Yep, and we're like, oh, and the vibration would raise in the room versus staying the same or dropping. And I think that affects the workflow for the day, the energy, the culture, everything, because we set the vibe, set the energy tone and everyone's synced to us, versus us all falling to the lowest common denominators.

Collette:

Well, you can do that in your personal household too, right?

Russell:

Yeah.

Collette:

So I'm thinking of Tony Robbins. He has this rock concert before he gets, get started, and then you settle down to his conference. So then you can I don't know, but it comes back to music and it goes back to the frequency that you so I mean. There's some mornings that we walk into our kitchen and I'm like, oh, my gosh it's so quiet.

Russell:

I need some music and then it kind of brings everybody alive, so good. Remember the kids were little. We do that. We like turn on the music and like jump them around, run around the kitchen trying to get them all pumped up.

Bart:

Yeah, I mean, you know, yeah, so when mom and dad are upset or mad or angry, or that had a crappy day, it's going to reflect onto them and anyway, it's just really cool to show up and love that so much, and so an add on question for both of you on that is is that when you start doing that, like, let's say, the office, for example, and you come in, let's say for a week, and you and Dave are just like pumped through the roof and show that you got a high energy, do people try to one-up you Then all?

Bart:

of a sudden in the office you start to see other people bringing the energy for you. I mean I'm just asking, I mean you have that in your office, but does it start to happen? Because I know what happens in sports, you know when. When one guy starts being super pumped, super. I know what happens in sports. You know when one guy starts being super pumped, super, everything else and everybody's like like you said, what the heck are you doing, brunson, that's like stupid and you're like, but you keep doing it. All of a sudden it's like he keeps winning. Yeah.

Bart:

I want some of that. You know what I'm saying, though Then all of a sudden it's like maybe I should try this and do it. You know that did. You see that in your office, and you see that in your houses too, you know that's what leadership I mean.

Russell:

Leadership is right. You set the tone, the vibe, the energy, whatever, and then people, in theory, will rise up to that same level. So you're not carrying the carrying the weight the whole time. At first it's usually you, though, carrying the weight right yeah, you got to be the leader starts the process and bring people up to your level and then, yeah, the right people, the best people, will capture on and keep running with it and helping, and and it magnifies everybody, yeah, so good.

Bart:

So one thing to think about in relationship that I do with Sunny is is, like, almost on a daily basis I don't know how many days I miss She'll, she'll can tell you but I truly try to send her a text every single morning of something I see or how much, how awesome she is and how what I love that she did. You know, and that energy, the energy from me showing that always gets a response back from her, and I think it's something that if you want to do something in your life right now to make a difference in what we're talking about here, is start lifting small weights by just send a text one day to your significant other or one of your children, just tell them how awesome they are and just see if that energy starts to just change and be different.

Sunny:

Awesome. I love all the things that you guys just said and, honestly, I feel like I missed that point here in the newsletter. So those who are listening to the podcast are going to get that gold nugget.

Sunny:

But really it is about the attitude you approach things with. Right, because if you sit and go, okay, I'm going to have to go through this pain and I don't want to, and this is miserable. You're not going to have the same outcome as if you're excited about your growth or where you're going or what's happening. I mean, even at the gym you're not excited to go lift that 50 pounds and it's torture every time you go. It's going to be a miserable journey. Why not make it more fun and more enjoyable, right? So how to take this idea and apply it to our own growth and how to build the strength to become who we're truly meant to be is kind of like what you just said starting to lift those small weights and progressing upwards. If you look at that in terms of your own life and maybe what's blocking you from becoming who you want to be, take an example of a perfectionist. So you have big dreams, you want to create, you want to contribute, make an impact, but your fear of not being perfect keeps you frozen, right? So then you have to kind of look at that and say, okay, which is the bigger pain? Like, am I going to go through my life as a perfectionist and be okay with that, or am I willing to go through the pain of pushing through that and becoming something different? And the key is always to start small, like you don't want to like go to the gym and pick up a 50 pound weight and think you're just going to lift it the first day, right. So start small, but do something that actually scares you a little bit, because if it doesn't scare you, you're not breaking through anything, you're not making any progress. Again, it doesn't have to be big. Maybe post something on social media, even if it's not perfect. Share, even if it's not perfect. Share your music, even if it scares you. Or start writing a book, even if it's messy. It's going to be uncomfortable at first, and it should be, but every small action strengthens your ability to keep moving forward. And you know, as our brains are amazing, and as you start to challenge yourself a little, those you know, your brain will start to rewire itself. It's going to form new pathways and allow you to tap into that energy that's truly wanting to express through you.

Sunny:

And another word that I kind of like maybe looked down on in the past, but it's kind of one of those words that's like it's either devastating or empowering and that is normalize.

Sunny:

Because, like, I look at things that maybe are normalized in a relationship or normalized in a society or something and I'm like that is are normalized in a relationship or normalized in a society or something and I'm like that is so dangerous. Like, if you're normalizing things that aren't good for you, um, you know, you're kind of risking yourself, but you can use normalizing things to empower you. Um, things that used to feel impossible all of a sudden start to feel normal to you. So let's say you're the perfectionist and you start showing up live every day and it scares you for like the first month and then all of a sudden you don't have to think about it anymore and it's just part of your normal everyday thing. Right, it can be such a power, powerful thing and it's all about making the conscious choice to lean into that discomfort and to stretch your capacity little by little. Any thoughts, guys?

Bart:

Yeah, and I don't know if it's around this, but it's something that kind of hit me. So it might take us on a little side tension. But, like I was thinking, I don't know why it hit me as flow state. You know, what energy do you have to be in to be in flow? And the reason it hit my head is because, like, as you start lifting weights, as you start doing that, you normalize something. It it can becomes repetitious, but when you get into flow state and that energy starts to build, it's amazing what you can do.

Bart:

And I watched a deal with Travis Pastrana and they were interviewing him on and you guys know who Travis Pastrana is. So he's the guy if you've I think you don't quote me, but he's either one of the first or the second that ever did a backflip on a motorcycle. But he's an extreme sports guy and when you look him up you'll know exactly who it is, because you've seen him in every monster truck and all these things he does, all these extreme sports. But they were talking to him about how do you get into flow state and he started talking about energy and how to start to channel that excitement, that thrill, that, all that stuff and then that builds you into to where you just become comfortable with being in flow.

Bart:

And I think musicians do it.

Bart:

I mean you get so much into your music and so much, so much emotion, so much feeling around that energy that it just throws you into such a state where you're all of a sudden, 12 hours later you're like I've been practicing for 12 hours, you know, but I think, find something that creates energy and then watch how it starts to build. And it's like I would use the example of a fire right, it starts with tiny kindling, but as soon as you start to add and start to build and to build, you'll find yourself in a fire and a really big fire or even to a bonfire. So if you're having trouble with your energy right now or you have a stuck energy, just go and start to look at that energy. What can you do positively that increases and builds and builds, builds. And if you have stuck energy, go figure out why it's stuck and really be honest with yourself. And then there's patterns and stuff you have to do to break that energy up. But get it broke up, get back to your normal, so anything else you guys have.

Russell:

The only thing I was thinking is um, I've been mildly obsessed for the last two years on just the concept of your subconscious mind, how it works. In fact, we bought subconsciouscom recently, um, cause we know a lot of cool stuff with that. But it's interesting because you think about or try to make those changes is a conscious decision. Consciously, we want to make this change and it could be scary or exciting, whatever. But then the problem is we already have something subconscious that's programmed. That's probably the opposite. We're consciously choosing, which is why it's scary and hard and painful. So it's like we have to break the subconscious thing that's holding us back while we are consciously creating the habit to habitually do something over and over and over again until it becomes the new pattern in your subconscious. And so it's that twofold thing that you mentioned. It's like you have to kill the old thing while you're reprogramming the new thing, and it takes time and energy and effort to both sides to get rid of the old pattern to build a new pattern. But over time it becomes easy, because then that becomes a new pattern, right, yeah, and I think I don't know.

Russell:

This is my belief. I'm pretty sure I'm still in my head pontificating all the things, but I think the purpose of this life, when all is said and done and we're finished and we have a chance to die and go back to heaven or wherever we go, I think that our subconscious mind is the record of who we became. It's the patterns of who we became. I think that's what God looks at and is like oh, who did you become? Oh, awesome, based on how you programmed your subconscious mind over time, this is who you actually became and that's the whole purpose of life, I think. And so this stuff's exciting. It's not just you know, whatever it's like. This is, the purpose of life is for us to figure out where we're going, break the old patterns, reprogram the programs we choose and then become the person we're supposed to become Like. That's the whole in my mind, the plan, yeah.

Bart:

And I think that in that plan, just for what it's worth, the more high energy that you keep yourself, the more fun the plan is, because, no matter what you're going to do and I think Sonny said it really clear in the newsletter is there's gonna be work, there's going to be a struggle, but at the end of the day, how you approach it, the energy you approach it with, and is it going to make all the difference in the world. So just take that time to really sit with yourself and say how much positive energy am I in my day and how much negative energy am I in my day and what are the things that I'm doing right now. Just make a list. I challenge you just to write a list down of what positive things you're doing every single day. So, are you sending out five gratitude texts? Are you sending your wife a note? Are you listening to music that makes you energy? Are you you know what are you doing that's causing high energy versus what are you doing that's causing you negative energy? Right, and how much of that state are you staying in? And think about that mentally, because if you're talking to yourself in bad language, that is putting you in a negative energetic state. So just remember that.

Bart:

So I think that was awesome. So, sonny, here you go, I'm all finished, you're all finished. Is that the wrap up? That's the wrap up, okay, so anything? No Collette on that.

Collette:

Liquid gold. I'm taking it all in you guys, I'm going to push myself because I'm the one that needs a little bit of growth. We all do. I had to push myself because I'm the one that needs a little bit of growth. We all do. There's no human that doesn't need it.

Bart:

And I think you're bringing up a great thing, because if you are in that state and you think that it's only because you're just literally working on yourself and when you're working on yourself, you're always the one that beats yourself up first.

Collette:

Yeah.

Bart:

Right 100%.

Bart:

Right, and I always tell all my coaching, I tell all my coaching people I ever coach with and I say this more than I like to say it but the number one person we lie to is us. Why, you know. But once we understand that, then we can face it and then we can start to build the energy. And that's what I'm saying. Just start with baby steps. I'm not perfect, sonny is, but you just start with something simple and, uh, just just crush it and you know like it's so fun being in your house because here's another thing to think about, cause you brought this up but like there's a high energy in your house. Well, that takes work, but you know what I'm saying. But you walk in other things and it's, it's not high vibration, so it doesn't just come with you, it comes in your environment of energy, things you put around you, and that's what I'm trying to get at, from music to where you reside, where you do these things.

Collette:

So, anyway, that's kind of cool, so good, so good, so good.

Bart:

You're all done, then Yep, okay, you're not going to do updates. Do you want to want to? Well, you usually wrap up with updates.

Sunny:

we like to say life updates, so you guys can do some life updates, yeah, about what we've been up to, but I mean, they're not generally that exciting. So first we're going to talk about the temperatures.

Sunny:

Last monday, a news article actually said that our area was colder than antarctica really but it is summer in antarctica, so it so it was a balmy 14 degrees there and it was like negative zero where we are. So I thought that was kind of interesting. And then we always look at each other and go why do we live here again?

Russell:

We wonder that too, I know.

Sunny:

We did make it to the gym a few times this week and we also went and hit a pickleball and you went and played with a bunch of men last night that kept you on your toes.

Bart:

Oh man, yeah, we went and played with too much pickleball and then, um, what else life updates? Anything with xander no all right, and then we made a trip to boise and we're here in boise, idaho, at the brunson's. So that's kind of our life updates. Now you guys have some cool life updates. That just happened recently.

Collette:

Well, Antarctic temperatures are real, but Boise has zero snow, so we have at least that going for us. There's that, and yeah gosh, our household is changing dramatically. We had a son just leave for a two-year mission for our church, which is super exciting, and then his twin brother has been out of the house for quite some time. And then we have a daughter leaving, coming up graduating.

Russell:

Going from five kids to two kids in the next five months.

Collette:

So talk about jumping into some new patterns and finding out my true identity again.

Russell:

But we're not grandparents yet, so you guys are ahead of us there.

Bart:

Well, I guess that's true, but you were shooting potato guns today so lots of life on the page I've yet to mature.

Bart:

All right, you guys. Well, we want to thank you guys for all listening to this. Hope this was fun for you it was really fun for us and stay tuned for next week and listen to the next one. But the only way that this gets spread is if you actually pass on the message. So if you like this, please share it with somebody. If it can help them out there, we'd be grateful for that. And this segment's brought to you by I do epic and click funnelscom.

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Bart Miller

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Sunny Miller

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