We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny
Welcome to We Play Full Out – where high-achieving entrepreneurs, spouses, and parents Bart and Sunny bring you real talk on showing up fully in business, marriage, family, and life!
For over 30 years, we’ve been playing full out together, building multiple million-dollar online businesses, challenging limiting beliefs, and raising a family. Our mission? To inspire you to do the same, with insights, strategies, and honest conversations on balancing work and family, strengthening relationships, and staying authentic in a world that often demands the opposite.
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From interviews with champions, thought leaders, and fellow entrepreneurs to sharing our own journeys, We Play Full Out is your go-to channel for advice and motivation to show up fully and live a life without regrets. Whether you're looking to ignite your business, deepen your relationships, or pursue personal growth, we’re here to support your journey.
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We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny
Learning the Lyrics to Your Target Market's "Songs"
Welcome to this week's episode of We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny!
Learning the Lyrics to Your Target Market's Songs
In this episode we are going to uncover an absolute gold mine for you to transform a cold audience into a warm audience... and then even into a Super Fan! The key is to get inside the heads of your target audience and speak to them in a way that makes them feel like you "get" them and you've "got them."
We share personal stories of how Sunny especially became a Super Fan of a group... all from listening to their lyrics and feeling like they understood her feelings and emotions almost better than she did and could articulate them back to her better than she could!
We also love to take lots of fun, windy little twists and turns in our discussions, so bring in networking and making new friends (not just acquaintances). We'll discuss what "learning the lyrics" means here and what you can do to take a "cold" acquaintance and immediately strike up rapport and understanding in just minutes. Bart, the Master Networker, is going to drop some gold for you on how to do just that!
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Welcome to. We Play Full Out with Bart and Sunny Miller. Take it away, Sunny.
Sunny:Thank you, Bart. Today we're talking about something really cool Nice, Because it has to do with music. Kind of Awesome. You know how crazy I am about all of that.
Bart:And I love it. It's one of my favorite things when I fell in love with you was just to watch the passion and the desire and just see how much it meant to you was just beyond anything to me. And to hear your amazing voice just still to this day just does it for me. So I'm excited.
Sunny:Thank you, and let's be clear, you are a music lover also.
Bart:Of course I love you I love that.
Sunny:Okay. Well, today we're talking like last week. We kind of had a really fun conversation about architecting our personalities. This week we're going to dive into a little bit of business, but I feel like it could be combined a lot with psychology, because marketing is really about getting into the minds of your target customers. 100%. It's the most important thing you can do. Yes, so the topic is learning the lyrics to your target market's quote. Unquote songs.
Bart:Yeah, that's great. I love that. That's cool. It's a good way to put it.
Sunny:Yes. So if you're a business owner or perhaps you're someone who likes to meet new friends or wants to learn how to network better because it can also kind of apply we'll talk about how that bridges later. Um, there's an obstacle you've got to overcome in order to get people to want to like you or listen to you and the marketing world. That's called taking a cold audience and turning them into a warm one. So for those of you who don't know, a cold audience is an audience of people who are not familiar with you and they've never heard of your products or your services. Now, a warm audience means your audience is aware of you, they're aware of your products and services and they probably have engaged with you in some way, but they have not bought from you yet. But if you're able to bridge the gap from cold to warm, your chances of selling someone the product or service you have increases exponentially.
Sunny:And just some stats and let's be clear, there's a lot of variables to whether you're opting in or selling or all the things. But when you email a cold audience, you can almost plan on a conversion rate of one to five percent, which I think it's vibes pretty high for cold if it's a sales page, not an opt-in. If you email a warm audience, you could anticipate a conversion rate of up to 15 percent. So it's dramatic because obviously they know you, they know your product, they know your service. They're going to be more likely to buy from you. So networking and meeting new people that you want to have as friends and I'm saying not just acquaintances like actual friends or people you can engage with works the same way. And it's basically the people want to be seen, heard and understood Yep, seen, heard and understood, yep. So how do we take people who have never heard about us and bring them into our ecosystem to the point they are interested in being friends with us or buying from us?
Bart:so good. I'm loving every second of this. It's right up my alley.
Sunny:It is right up your alley because you're a master at it, thank you. Oh, you really are. And we'll talk about more that, like when we come to the networking portion, especially Because if you have not seen Bart Miller Network, it would blow your mind. Okay, we're going to dive into one of my favorite bands on the planet Earth, which is 21 Pilots and side note going to a concert in just a couple of days the Clancy World Tour let's go. And side note, going to a concert in just a couple of days the Clancy World Tour, let's go. So when our daughter Kenya was in middle school, she became obsessed with 21 Pilots and at the time, like many teenagers, especially in middle school where you're trying to figure out where you fit into the world, she was kind of struggling with some mental health issues that I don't think we fully understood all the way, and I just want to point out some of you may be thinking of your kids this way, and or yourself.
Bart:So if you are struggling with mental health issues and you are dealing with this, you hear this this might be a good band for you to follow. I just want to throw that out there.
Sunny:Yeah, I would agree with that. So she became obsessed with Twenty One Pilots and when we looked at them, they're wearing skeleton shirts and there's a lot of darkness and a lot of red, and Tyler Joseph has black on his hands and his throat and they're singing songs that are called things like Guns for Hands and we really didn't take the time to step back and listen to their music. Just kind of made a rush, you know. I would say judgment of like like these guys can't be good for you, okay, like you probably shouldn't listen to them, like don't love it, right?
Bart:human nature right kicked in as a parent and we looked at and judged something that we didn't know enough about yeah, but on the flip side, um, we did let her go to a concert oh, yeah, yeah, no, we supported her.
Sunny:And even further. I think it was her birthday and we decided to take her to a concert, even though we still really weren't fans of them. We were fans of Kenya. So we took her to a concert and we were actually really surprised at what an amazing show these two men put on Like it was phenomenal One of the best shows I've ever seen. These two men put on like it was phenomenal, one of the best shows I've ever seen, and they were also really thoughtful about their ecosystem and about the parents who were there with their kids they won me over through that yeah, they did.
Sunny:And so, um, basically what happened was everybody's on their feet and they're screaming and they're, you know, bopping to the music and having a great time, and they took a moment. Um, they've set up a really beautiful scene. And then Tyler said okay, you know, parents, we want to let you have some rest, so everybody sit down.
Bart:Yeah, he, he said it in the way that I thought was so really, really good too, is he? He looked out the audience and he said hey, you guys, we know who bought the tickets to come here, we know who supporting you to be here, so we want to give them a break for a few minutes and we ask you if you'll sit down and support your parents and taking a break and let us play this next song as we all sit and I was like, oh my gosh, how did you know?
Bart:who does that? Thank you, yes, very, very grateful for that very, very grateful.
Sunny:So fast forward again. And a new album came out during covid year and it was a year that, um, obviously nobody could really put on shows. So they did a live stream show and kenya was like hey, you guys should watch this.
Sunny:And we did and it was really good it was beyond good but still like I hadn't connected to their lyrics yet for some reason. And that album, let's be clear, it's a different vibe than most of their music because it fits into a storyline that we're not going to get into. So there weren't a lot of probably really deep lyrics in that one. And then Kenya was just kind of saying like, hey, you guys like that Mom, you should listen to Vessel. It's like my favorite album. I think you'd really like it. I was like, well, well, you know, I really like Scale the Nicey, you know I'll probably put it on.
Sunny:And at the time I was doing my bodybuilding and I had two cardio sessions I had to do a day. So I thought why not? So I put my my headphones in and started listening to Vessel. And I started listening to the lyrics and all of a sudden I felt like Tyler Joseph was in my head and that he could read my thoughts and that he could articulate what I was feeling back to me better than I could articulate it. And from that moment on I became a full-on super fan.
Sunny:And I've bought pretty much I wouldn't say I've bought like all their limited edition stuff and all that, but all their albums. Um, we've bought some swag and I wouldn't say I've bought like all their limited edition stuff and all that, but all their albums. We've bought some swag and we're going to our third concert and I am a hyper fan. I'll tell people about it. And then a step further is you know, he hooked me even more because they came up with their Tyler Joseph lore and you and I are both big fans of psychology of lore, and you and I are both big fans of psychology, and he created a whole hero's journey behind all of his albums. That's just like incredible. So it's like he just kept blowing me away like one after the next, after the next. So what does this all have to do with all of this? Um, he knew the lyrics that were in my head, and I'm not the only one. This is how, like, a fan is born, or somebody who wants to buy your stuff.
Sunny:Um, I was scrolling Facebook and somebody was like not frustrated, but she was like I don't understand Taylor Swift phenomena. Basically, she's like. I'm not dissing her, I just honestly don't get it. Can somebody please explain it to me? I thought, oh, that's a really interesting topic. So I went and looked through all the comments and it was kind of the same thing. It's like the lyrics. Taylor Swift gets me like she understands me. She gets what I'm going through Like. These lyrics really resonate with me. So Jay Abraham, who you've listened to for a long time he's a master marketer said it best when he said if you can define the problem better than your target customer, they will automatically assume you have a solution. Is that a mic drop?
Bart:Yeah, most. Definitely. I mean Jay hit it on the head. That's why he was so brilliant in what he did and, you know, such a still iconic figure in the marketing space.
Sunny:Absolutely so. Learning the lyrics is actually a phrase I got from Pat Flynn's book Superfans, and so the goal is, as a marketer or, once again, as a networker, but it kind of in a different way you want to go and learn the lyrics, learn what's already playing in your customer's head, and then you play it back to them. The goal is to use the exact same phrases and words they use when they describe your excuse me when they describe their problems that you have a solution for, and then, once you have those words down, you use them on your opt-in pages, sales pages, email, social media ads, like anywhere you can get them, because once again you're going out to a cold audience. They see that you're saying what they're feeling. They are going to be drawn to you. So it's just some ways to do this really quickly, and I think the best way is just to make a spreadsheet and you just want to call them for emotional keywords and phrases, because we want the emotion. That's what you really want to dive into.
Bart:I think you want emotion and beliefs.
Sunny:Yeah, emotion and beliefs.
Bart:Yeah, so their beliefs. Let's say that they believe a certain thing and you have the emotional trigger. If they still don't have the belief, they're not going to match with you.
Bart:So I think, I think, I would get deeper in the psychology of this right now, but I really believe the number one thing we want to understand about somebody that you want to be close to is what do they believe. Want to be close to is what do they believe. Once you understand their beliefs and what their psychology is around a belief, then you can trigger the emotion. That's the fastest way to get to emotion is through, in my personal opinion, is through a belief. So, even though you elicit emotion, if I sit and go, well, that emotion's there but I don't believe like this person, I still won't become an integrate into it. Does that make sense?
Sunny:I do. But do you think that kind of where Jay Abraham is like, says like they'll assume you have the solution if you articulate it?
Bart:Yeah, I understand what you're trying to say and I'm not gonna like we could spend a whole two hours on just this right here, and I I'm with you.
Bart:But I I'm here to challenge the fact that if you understand somebody's core beliefs, then you will know the emotions that will elicit them to be involved in things quicker. If you just go after an emotion alone, it's not that it won't work right, but they're always going to go back and check your beliefs and see if you're congruent with them in some way, shape or form. So like, let's say, you got into 21 pilots and just love the lyrics, but they have belief structure that was not in congruence with you. Would you become a?
Sunny:super fan or would you just like them? Couldn't tell you.
Bart:Right, so anyway, once again, I don't mean to pull off topics, so let's go Well. I mean, I think, you need to call them. Just go through and what your beliefs are, what you think their beliefs are, see if their beliefs are aligning and then go to the emotions.
Sunny:Well, and it is another layer because, let's be clear, if I'm selling them something and they already have a belief system that something else is better. You know there's lots of, lots of layers to this, but let's start with the lyrics yeah, I'll just go back.
Bart:So here's how I'll just sum this up really quick, so back in the day when I was in my earlier stages of marketing, let's say, I wanted to learn how to be the best speaker in the world. Okay, now I could, I could start looking for the best speaker in the world. Let's and this is this is we'll just use a true example the best speaker in the world.
Bart:In my opinion and maybe I haven't really studied it for a while, but used to be obama he was a phenomenal speaker, but, that being said, because of my beliefs even though emotionally he can move me speeches like so powerful I would have never learned from the man because of my beliefs. Now I grew up in that because a mentor told me he says what would you actually hiring the person? For their beliefs or what they can teach you? Right? And I was like oh, that's a good point, I'm not hiring for all. But back in the day, prior to that understanding and that maturity of myself, I would not have, even though he was the best he could do, all the things like emotionally, and even like I was like, dang this guy, but because of the way I believed I would have never done business. Does that make sense?
Sunny:Yep, okay, anyway, just kind of how?
Bart:why I'm seeing it the way I see it. Just to give you an example.
Sunny:Yeah, and I guess let's be clear too, like you can cast a wide net, not everybody's gonna jive with you. Yeah, we can spin it like spin, all right. Okay. So if you want to start finding emotional keywords and triggers and and things like that, you can search in facebook or reddit. Reddit is a gold mine because people are just full on. This is how it is right for the keyword for your target audience. So in facebook, you could type in entrepreneurs in the search bar and then click on groups, find the most popular group, join it and start to see what kinds of discussions people are having in those groups.
Sunny:And the goal is to find common words, keywords and phrases type words like I need help with in the group search bar and just see what comes up, see what people, how they're describing what pain they're experiencing with the challenges they have, and then put them on your spreadsheet. So things like I was struggling, I felt stuck or I was hopelessly overwhelmed you know all the things that they're experiencing. And then this one's kind of a new one for me, but I love it so much and that's checking out your competitors. Reviews Like you don't even have to have any yet If you have a competitor that kind of has the same solution.
Sunny:You do go read the reviews and usually people will kind of have a before I got the solution, I was this and then an after.
Sunny:So you want to check out the befores and find all those keywords and phrases and record them and this one is also kind of new, which I also love, and as you can go to Google, search it for your keyword and when you scroll down the page a little way, you'll see a section that says people always ask and there's all these topics and all these arrows that you can just keep expanding on, expanding on, expanding on, and those are the things people like intentionally typed into Google, and the best thing you can do is find like a pain or a negative topic, because people want to move away from pain more than they want to simply read a solution.
Sunny:So we've talked about this before as marketers, why it's important to call out the pain and not the solution all the time. And then having a real life conversation with your audience, and that requires like face to face, like you just send out an email and say, hey, would you be willing to get on a call with me for 10 minutes? Just ask them questions and just listen, because we've talked about this before. But how many times do we think we know what our customers want or experiencing and then it's not the thing that we think it is?
Bart:So good.
Sunny:And then the last one is ask method and surveys. And then the last one is ask method and surveys so you can survey your group or your audience to get their thoughts and opinions, and you can get a google form, which is absolutely free, and just see who will be willing to give you some feedback. So, like we said, lyrics are powerful. I mean, how many times do you just go to a song and listen to it over and over and over again? Because it's just so good. Words are powerful and when you can help your customers understand that you really get them and you've really got them, they will assume you have the best solution for them and will want to be part of your world. Now let's talk about this in networking. Okay, because you're not probably going to go search out people's pains and frustrations to go be friends with them. So what are you going to do?
Bart:It's really good. But a lot of times, which is interesting if you understand your beliefs, you will spot people in the ecosystem that are very congruent with you because of what they wear and because of different things. So there's certain ecosystems like when we lived in St George I could walk into certain areas, recognize certain people instantly because of what they wore and know what their belief structure was.
Bart:So, that being said, I can watch somebody wear a cross necklace. What is that going to tell me, right? So like there's a lot of cues that you wear that actually defy your define, your beliefs, that you don't even realize, OK, but let's say I spot the cross necklace.
Sunny:Okay, what good does that do me as a networker? How do I then?
Bart:approach something. So your question is is how do I network the best? Is that your question?
Sunny:Well, it's like kind of like learning the lyrics, but yeah, okay.
Bart:Well, that's what I'm trying to say so. I analyze their entire body to see what the music is being played from the outside.
Bart:Right, because if they're all dressed in black, I can make all sorts of assumptions. But I can tell you the certain things that are going to go through my head to say, okay, this is profiling, that's what they call it. I'm profiling that person with the lyrics to say, oh, they're this. If a person was dressed in Western boots and a cowboy hat and I understand the Western background, I'm going to either say, oh, not a real cowboy or a real cowboy because of this, this, this. I'm looking at all these different cues that I can look at to analyze and see what kind of world is their world, because if I can see that they're Western and they're a cowboy, I can easily strike up a conversation around that. Or if I see certain things I can like the cross or things like that, I don't start with, hey, how are you, dude? You know like, that's usually it.
Sunny:I'm like oh man, that's really well. And I want to stop you right there, because a lot of people, when they go to networking events, that's what they do yeah, who are you, where are you from, what do you do? Yeah, and you're saying no. Analyze them, look at what they're wearing, figure out like their belief systems and structures and what's important to them, and then approach them with that and get them talking about themselves well, for example.
Bart:So, like I, I have a simto watch that a lot of people love. It's a collector simto watch for climbing, and when I wear that watch, climbers that are really great climbers will instantly always come up to me and say dude, that's an awesome suit to watch. Well, what does that do? In my conversation?
Bart:It's not about it's like well, I bought this, I did this, and we're talking about things that are super cool, so I always like to start a conversation off on something that I notice about them that I think is really cool, like I even like the glasses you're wearing right now. Right, I could walk up and say, oh my gosh, sonny, those glasses are really cool. I love how the flowers are on the sides of them. But I don't just walk up and say, hey, just wanted to introduce myself. My name's Bart. How are you Right? It's just a totally different way of talking and relating to people.
Bart:I can instantly say oh my gosh, sunny, that's such a gorgeous necklace. That's a Tiffany's necklace, right? And she's going to say well, yes, it is. I don't know if you know, but I bought one of those for my daughter. She absolutely loves it. Do you love yours?
Sunny:Absolutely, I do.
Bart:So I'm always looking and that's why I coach on talking pieces, because talking pieces allow you to have conversations around things you want to have conversations around and that it's fun to have conversations around. So, like I say, I always call it, wherever you want, profile, which gives me the lyrics. Try to find one thing If it's a shoe, if it's a the way their hair is done, if it's I mean there's a million different things and then if I want to have a conversation with them, that's the one thing I start the conversation with and that opens a conversation.
Sunny:And so much easier to move somebody from a cold acquaintance to a warm one.
Bart:Yeah, absolutely, because then you have hopefully something in common.
Sunny:Yeah, and just a funny story here, because I never thought about a tattoo as being a talking piece. Now I do more now that you have yours, but back in the day I really didn't. And we were at a at the zoo and I saw this gentleman who had a treble clef tattoo and I was like you gotta be a musician, dude, because nobody but a musician's gonna put a treble clef on his arm. And it did get me talking to him. I'm like, hey, what's this all about? Find out, he's a musician, he's played jazz and he is a hispanic um band member and really, really good.
Sunny:But it got us down this whole rabbit hole of conversations, ending with him inviting xander and I and you to come to one of his concerts, because at the time xander was really listening to a lot of that kind of music. But how fast was that from cold to warm, where, if he wouldn't have had that on, probably we just said, hey, can we sit here, had some food, have a nice night, you know and you'll notice this, when people wear funnel hacker outfits to the gym or they wear them different things.
Bart:I mean, if you know it, you know it, you'll walk up, you'll want to talk to them. That's what starts the conversation. So hopefully that helps you in one networking thing yeah, so that's cool.
Sunny:So, learning the lyrics, you can turn a cold audience to a warm one online, and you can also do it in networking and in-person events, which is super, super cool. Hope this has been helpful for you.
Bart:It's just a really fun way to look at playing the game 100 and networking will make you millions, and the better you get at it, the the more masterful you can create the relationships you're looking for and have more meaning relationships to be able to expand the things you're doing.
Sunny:Yeah, and I do like that. You said that too because, like, networking is, for sure, great for business, but it's also great for having a fulfilling life. All right, so we're going to transition into our life updates. So this week we're busy architecting our presentation for FHL International. It's going to be so great. We're so excited to share some incredible gold nuggets with everyone who attends. So I would say, if you feel stuck in your life and unable to accomplish your big dreams and goals, maybe you've even just finally given up on them.
Bart:This talk is for you. Yeah, 100 them um this talk is for you, yeah, 100.
Sunny:And this conference is for you, yes, for those of you who are high achievers but still aren't where you want to be and can't figure out why this talk is for you. We're going to be discussing how to create and live a life that is so epic that it shocks even you.
Bart:Yeah, it's the things I've learned over my career, it's the things I've studied, it's the things I've mastered, and we have come out with a course that is literally changing people's lives dramatically, dramatically. And not only that. It is so fun because we're given the behind the scenes of how to really really live the life that they've been dreaming of, and this is for couples and everybody, so it's super cool.
Sunny:It is. So if you want to still get your ticket, we recommend you do so. Funnelhackinglivecom. Slash Bart dash and dash Sunny.
Bart:Don't forget those dashes.
Sunny:Don't forget those dashes, or you won't get there.
Bart:Yeah, and we want you to overwhelm the Funnel Hacking Live people of how amazing this talk is yes, the funnel hacking live people of how amazing this talk is, and tell them like, oh my gosh, I can't believe these guys weren't your number one speakers. We've never seen them on your main stage. We've seen several of the other people on there multiple times, let's go All right.
Sunny:What else? We had an epic date night on Saturday.
Bart:Oh, my gosh, was it so magical. It was magical, so magical.
Sunny:So, for those of you who don't know, we love to do a major date night at least once a month. We have a theme, we usually do a fun photo shoot, we have food or games geared to our theme and of course, there's lots of romance thrown in.
Bart:Yeah, the next one is going to be body just getting this is not rated explicit, just kidding.
Sunny:All right, zander's driving pretty darn good, doing great, which means I'm no longer grabbing the car handle every two minutes or so, it's more like every 10. There you go, and uh, it's fun to see him progress. He's going to be attending school as a freshman in just a few weeks and also still on track for all state auditions on his saxophone about a month. Um, speaking of well, I've already mentioned 21 pilots. Yep, again worth mentioning. Again, we'll take lots of photos. So if you're not following us on instagram, go do it, go do it. And then, finally, today is our oldest daughter, mercedes. Birthday. Big shout out to her, big shout. She's an oldie, 27 years today, and I just want to say what an amazing human she is she is. She's smart, talented, beautiful, hardworking, kind, thoughtful, with a little sass to keep us on our toes.
Bart:Gotta love the sass, absolutely, and if you want to support her, go to her. Etsy store at relive the magic at home. Buy a candle or tiktok, relive the magic at home. Yeah, that'd be amazing. So if you want to support her, go buy a candle. She'll get it shipped out to you absolutely.
Sunny:Anything else you'd like to add?
Bart:had my elbow injected. So thank you, dr west, for injecting that. That was super kind to you. And uh, did a bunch of stuff on that. Um been laying on the pmf mat a lot if you've been tracking me, um and I've been doing a lot of brain tap. I have a lot of people I recommend it to, but I just don't think they put in the work. What I mean by that is you've got to be consistent, you've got to listen to it, you've got to dedicate yourself to it. Also doing some cold plunges, which I don't love, but I'm going to you know I'm after it, all that kind of stuff and really been playing some good competitive pickleball.
Sunny:Yeah, you have.
Bart:I have a lot of fun with that.
Sunny:I beat him up a little today, not going to lie, that's right she did.
Bart:She got you Just kidding, which was great, and I've been enjoying the roping that I've been doing and just really just being present in the times that I've had and I'm super, super excited about that. I've had and I'm super super excited about that and been doing a ton of work with Gabe Roberts, so big shout out for Gabe Roberts he is.
Sunny:I was just going to say he's got a book from pain to purpose on Amazon. We highly recommend going to get it, yeah.
Bart:I super fascinating and just so grateful that I found him in my life.
Sunny:For sure, him and his wife are just genuine, like if you want a practitioner who cares about you, uh, gabe is. Gabe is your guy, that's right.
Bart:So I think that's pretty much a rap horse, right? That's it. So you guys, stay tuned. We can't uh, obviously grow this without you. So I'm asking you once again please ask a friend to listen or pass it on or, you know, get somebody to opt into the list, because this really is our passion. We're trying to play full out with you and express that. But if you have something you want to ask and nothing's off limits, ask it.
Sunny:Yeah, we'd love to talk about what you want to hear.
Bart:Yeah, because you know what We've got? Lots of years of marriage, lots of years of changing beliefs, lots of years of raising kids, lots of years of having animals lots of years and we may just look like we have it all together.
Sunny:but let's be clear. It's taken us a while to get here, I'm telling you, man. So we got lots of stuff we could talk about.
Bart:We know how to fight like the best of them. Let's go All right, you guys. So, with that, have an awesome, awesome weekend and until next week, this segment brought to you by I.